Lily, I feel vulnerable to them in the digital domain. They are well hidden off my PC, but god forbid something happens to me. The content of those videos goes far beyond personal. (The first half of them I'm crying like a little boy most of the time.)
But maybe you're right. I just need to safeguard them at the highest level. I'll think about it.
On that note, I don't save them anymore since I found my wonderful Caren and fell in love again. I have moved on from that point in my life when this type of therapy works on a regular basis. It's really for when you're in crisis.
"One pixel can change everything."
Before the digital age, when going through a particularly ruff period in life, I used to write it all down, each night, vent it out big time. Kept it for a day, re read it and burned it. Sort of set me on the path of realizing to change the way I looked at things. Good times in life now.
So glad to hear things are looking up for you Brian.
I had to make decisions about an archive not too long ago. I know what you mean about things being beyond personal. I Scarlett O'Hara'ed my decision and will deal with it tomorrow, because it *is* another day. (And so is the next day after that...and the next one....and the next one.....)
But see, you found Caren!
Alas, I'm still waiting for Swooney Clooney to make good on that limo and tickets to Laglio. And I still have that bloody archive. *sigh*
Pick up a good book. My suggest is It, by Stephen King. Get lost in the lives of other people with other problems. It might help you get perspective. At the very least it is a good distraction. Even if it doesn't help the original problem at all, you will get a good book out of it. I'm going to be blunt. You are going to have a problem only as long as you want to have a problem. There is no magic cure. There are not shortcuts. You can spend a lot of money on professional help (they are called professionals for a reason). You can read a lot of self help books. You can try drowning your sorrows. None of those things will help unless you simply decide you are done with it. Life will go on, but only when you decide to let it.