We actually had "the paddle" at our Catholic school. It was used only for the worst offenses, which usually meant once or twice during the whole school year. It kind of looked like a ping pong paddle with holes drilled in it. Whoever was getting paddled would find out days ahead of time, most likely so they would experience the most anxiety possible. The whole school knew about it, too. On the appointed day, the janitor (he was the official paddler) would come to the classroom and call the deviant into the hall. This boy ( it was always a boy) usually went out smiling, to show he wasn't afraid. A few seconds later, we'd all hear two whacks in quick succession and that would be it. But the psychological repercussions linger on...
It's the Catholic church. It's never going to drastically change.
Think of this way: if you were to join an exclusive club and they had rules, would you expect them to allow you to blatantly break them left and right and still be part of the club? No. I was a lapsed Catholic for many years and found my way back 5 years or so ago. I am a gay man and I deal with the Catholic Church's stance on this in my own way. What I have with my God is a personal thing. I find way too much comfort and solace in the church I attend (the clergy and the parishioners) to denounce the Catholic religion as a whole.
I am studying the Catechism and this is from my lesson today:
God gives himself to each one of us individually, and he wants to transform us through communion with him. Once we are transformed, we are supposed to transform the world. Everything else that the Church is besides that is secondary.
I would also like to point out that the Catholic church is full of humans, ordinary people. Some better at what they do than others. While you are quite entitled to your opinion and you are quite right to ask questions, remember you had the misfortune to get a one sided answer from a narrow minded woman.