Lies!! And such...

[Debbie913]

Lets talk lies.
I realize most people have a problem with being lied to, but what about lying to others? What makes it a lie? Does intent matter? What about omission of all the facts? Do you see that as a lie?

I think people have different opinions on things, and I am curious to get others' perspective on this...

Personally, I believe in honesty...at all costs. I won't lie to you, so don't lie to me!! I don't think intent should matter all that much...a lie is a lie, whether or not you meant it as such. See? The end result is what counts. Which is why I also believe omission of the facts constitutes a lie. Feelings are often hurt by this behavior, yes?

Share your thoughts, please!!

 

[Walter Oobleck]

Well...bullshit makes the plants grow. Figure that one out. Some plants thrive on bullshit.
Lying is prohibited by the ninth commandment.
The devil is the father of lies.
Honesty is punished, lies are rewarded...if we reversed that I suspect we'd get more honesty, less lies. But some plants thrive on bullshit, wouldn't have it any other way.

“When truth is replaced by silence,the silence is a lie.”
― Yevgeny Yevtushenko

Better is open rebuke, than hidden love.

 

[Liselle]

Some people lie to spare others feelings, these are so called white lies. I don't like people lying to me but I accept that this will happen and I have on occasion used white lies especially if someone is really low and what I say could push them down further. I have admitted to the person when they are feeling better that I lied and explained the reason why and they have understood and even thanked me for sparing their feelings at that time.

 

[Grandpa]

Everybody lies. Oh, I don't mean literally every person on the planet who ever lived, but virtually everybody lies to some extent. It's a question of degree, intent, consequences, and discoverability that results in how much of a transgression it is.

 

[Neesy]

Lets talk lies.
I realize most people have a problem with being lied to, but what about lying to others? What makes it a lie? Does intent matter? What about omission of all the facts? Do you see that as a lie?

I think people have different opinions on things, and I am curious to get others' perspective on this...

Personally, I believe in honesty...at all costs. I won't lie to you, so don't lie to me!! I don't think intent should matter all that much...a lie is a lie, whether or not you meant it as such. See? The end result is what counts. Which is why I also believe omission of the facts constitutes a lie. Feelings are often hurt by this behavior, yes?

Share your thoughts, please!!

This is a really loaded subject - there was something on TV about the "Asian lie" on a CBC documentary I think. How a little girl cleaned something up, but then when asked if she did it said no. It was called a 'modesty lie'.

When they tested the North Americans they asked "Did the little girl lie" and they said yes, whereas those from an Asian culture said no, it was not really a lie.

I believe omitting facts or leading someone to believe a certain thing when it is not really the case is indeed a lie. My ex used to do this all the time, but if you called him out on something he would say he did not lie.
(That has nothing to do with my first example). I just meant what is to someone a lie, to another person they would think it is okay.

It makes it hard to trust someone when you find out they are sneaky. (Just my two cents worth).

 

[GNTLGNT]

Lets talk lies.
I realize most people have a problem with being lied to, but what about lying to others? What makes it a lie? Does intent matter? What about omission of all the facts? Do you see that as a lie?

I think people have different opinions on things, and I am curious to get others' perspective on this...

Personally, I believe in honesty...at all costs. I won't lie to you, so don't lie to me!! I don't think intent should matter all that much...a lie is a lie, whether or not you meant it as such. See? The end result is what counts. Which is why I also believe omission of the facts constitutes a lie. Feelings are often hurt by this behavior, yes?

Share your thoughts, please!!

...I will not bald-face lie, however I will manipulate the truth to something a little less blunt-to spare someone's feelings....

 

[king family fan]

Lies really hurt so many. I hate to be lied too for so many reasons.

 

[Grandpa]

Cop: Do you know how fast you were going? or....
Cop: How much have you had to drink?

For the following, if they're asking something that you don't think they want to hear the correct answer:

Spouse: What was keeping you up so late at your computer?
Boss: Why are you late coming back from lunch?
Boss: I need this. When can you get done with it?
Boss/client: Why is this late?
Auditor: Was this a business expense?
Female friend/romantic interest: Does this make me look fat?
Husband: Was that good for you too?
Significant other:
Do you think I'm getting too heavy?
Is my hair getting too thin?
Is my hair getting too gray?
Should I be worried about anything?
Would you mind if I went out with the pals for a while?

Just a smattering of things. There's too many thousands of possibilities that call for less-than-truth in the ordinary course of business to ordinary people to list them all.

 

[Autumn Gust]

...I will not bald-face lie, however I will manipulate the truth to something a little less blunt-to spare someone's feelings....

That's what I do too.

 

[Flat Matt]

I can honestly say that I have never lied in my life.

True or false?

 

[Lord Tyrion]

My favorite definition comes from Sam Harris who wrote a book on the subject. He defined it as concealing the truth from people when they expect it. So if someone continuously cheats on their spouse, not telling their spouse (assuming they would want to know) would be considered lying. Also, one can lie by making statements that are factually correct but misleading. For example, if someone goes to the White House and stands in front of the gates and calls their friend saying, "I'm calling you from the White House." That would also be a lie because it was misleading.

I think one should be truthful as possible because lying puts people in tight situations that usually ends bad.

 

[Grandpa]

 

[king family fan]

To many lies kills feelings.

 

[DiO'Bolic]

Do I look fat in this dress?

 

[KingAHolic]

There is always a place for a lie. It can even be viewed in some situations as a sacrifice (sometimes you want to be honest and not lie, but, because the truth will hurt someone else badly, you don't say it).

Otherwise, the truth does set you free. The degree of truthfulness you have with someone also is dependent on the closeness and "safety" you feel with someone. Such a hard question to answer in the absolute.

 

[TheRedQueen]

Tell me the truth. All of it, even if you think I might not like what I hear. I would rather deal with a little hurt now, than deal with a big hurt later. And yes, I want to know if my outfit makes me look bad. I want to know if my driving needs improvement. I want to know what my husband is thinking about, even if it's sick and twisted. And yes, call me on my behavior if I'm being bitchy. Just be honest with me. I can handle it, and it makes life a lot easier.
On the flip side, there are people who simply can't handle the truth. They say they can, but when you tell them, they lose their frigging minds. So people like that, they practically ask to be lied to. I try to avoid people like that, because I don't like to lie. It's too much work, too much drama, and too much to remember. But I have people like that in my family, so being diplomatic is sometimes the better option to being honest.
Which is why I'm so damned antisocial. There is no "fix it and forget it" method to dealing with humans.

 

[KingAHolic]

there are people that want the truth, and, if you tell them, it's imprinted in their mind forever and it causes issues. I have had this with family members... e.g. I just can't get past when you said "x,y,z" .... I don't consider NOT telling someone the truth (not saying anything) a lie. I "DO" consider the following scenario a lie, or at a minimum, a "deception". This is a true story, my mom would have me do this.... If I got a call and didn't want to talk to someone, I would tell my mom to tell them I wasn't home or was busy -- if that wasn't true, she would make me go outside on the deck so you could tell them I wasn't "in the house"!

 

[GNTLGNT]

I can honestly say that I have never lied in my life.

True or false?

...dead men don't lie...

 

[GNTLGNT]

Do I look fat in this dress?

...does this ass make my dress look fat?.....

 

[Liselle]

I can honestly say that I have never lied in my life.

True or false?

I would say false....you said a word liars tend to use to justify their lies.