Mom
- Thread starter Haunted
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I unfortunately don't have great mom stories. She was smart, had a good sense of humor, but terribly conflicted about a number of things. Motherhood just wasn't quite natural to her, and after having a baby (me) after getting premaritally knocked up in the '50s, when it wasn't exactly fashionable especially for Catholic girls, the maternal instincts that she did have were pretty well swallowed up by her feelings of guilt and punishment (because she had no others after me).
I have good memories of my mom, but just as many or more that aren't in the "good" category. I took care of her until she died, because that's what families do, but I wish it had been a healthier relationship, one that I could honestly call "loving." I've tried to compensate for that in the closeness of Grandma and our descendants, and I hope it's been successful.
Sorry. Don't mean to be a downer. I will say that the kids of my wife have some charming stories to tell about their mom!
I have good memories of my mom, but just as many or more that aren't in the "good" category. I took care of her until she died, because that's what families do, but I wish it had been a healthier relationship, one that I could honestly call "loving." I've tried to compensate for that in the closeness of Grandma and our descendants, and I hope it's been successful.
Sorry. Don't mean to be a downer. I will say that the kids of my wife have some charming stories to tell about their mom!
Updates on your mom?...thanks ma, neither one of us is perfect-but ya done good...
...she was dismissed from the hospital just a few days ago and sent to a local nursing home for interim care, until she was scheduled for surgery to remove a huge kidney stone, which has been causing part of her problems-she's back in the hospital now, because the nursing home freaked out last night-thinking she had cellulitis in her arm. Just came from seeing her, and she looks and sounds good-considering. Should be discharged from the hospital again tomorrow-since the staff there have been scratching their heads-as have I, as to why she was sent in the first place....arrrgggghhhhh!...and bless you for asking Deej...oh btw, we'll have new goat pics for you soon....
Neesy
#1 fan (Annie Wilkes cousin) 1st cousin Mom's side
Hope the removal of the large kidney stone helps - sounds like she is on her way to a good recovery! (So I take it that the Nursing Home jumped to conclusions?) - I suppose it was a case of better safe than sorry.
Good healing vibes being sent to your Mom, Scott
Hope the removal of the large kidney stone helps - sounds like she is on her way to a good recovery! (So I take it that the Nursing Home jumped to conclusions?) - I suppose it was a case of better safe than sorry.
Good healing vibes being sent to your Mom, Scott
Neesy, speaks truth. Sir Giant, you must be very vigilant of your mother's care in the nursing home.
My mother was not there when I needed her.
You don't want to hear mine.
But, to be fair, she was highly intelligent, well educated, talented and fearless. Those aren't bad qualities to hope to inherit.
I'll give a few of you a laugh. My mom told me she lost over 20 pounds when she was a teenager, just by giving up mashed potatoes! 
Grandma was an EXCELLENT German cook! 
Grandma was an EXCELLENT German cook! 
I still miss my mom everyday. The last time we spoke on the phone our son was a newborn baby. He was crying (as they do) and she told me to put the phone up to him. She started talking to him and he stopped crying. I got backon the phone and she said 'better you than me'. We had a good laugh. She died a few days after that conversation. I'm glad we ended on a laugh.
That's a nice way to look at things! The last conversation I ever had with my father was a fight. He died unexpectedly a few months later. That was a little over a year ago. Having a positive "last" memory is something to be grateful for. I know that's probably not much comfort when you love and miss someone...(Here's a hug for you, too!)
Oh my gosh, how touching and so sad. I'm glad she got to "talk" to your son.
lol!I'll give a few of you a laugh. My mom told me she lost over 20 pounds when she was a teenager, just by giving up mashed potatoes!
We learn things even from mommas that don't quite know how to be one.
Exactly so.
All things said and done, we were very close. Even when that wasn't necessarily a good thing. I'll see or hear something, whether it's a seagull or a biplane (both from one favorite author) and know that nobody else would understand it the same way she would have. So I ponder it quietly.
Dana Jean Lovely! So good you could be that close to your mom, even if it meant a painful goodbye. What a gift!
(((Doowop))) ((((Haunted))))
GNTLGNT good news!
My mom, le sigh. When I need to sound off, she listens, and then holds up a mirror so I can see where I failed in the situation. Is that a good thing? Maybe. If your mom can't tell you the difficult things, who can? I always think of all those moms in Amy Tan novels when I think about my relationship with my mother. Complicated and misunderstood.
And my brother and sister have been so needy throughout their lives, that they consume whatever time she has. I'm pretty self sufficient and I have a good husband and good in-laws, so she kind of leaves me to do my thing, but then she feels like I never need her for anything - so that hurts her feelings. She's there when I need her. But when she calls me, I know something's up. She never calls just to chat. That's a good thing too.
I worry about the kind of mom I am. I feel like Aurora Greenway - I baby my children way too much.
(((Doowop))) ((((Haunted))))
GNTLGNT good news!
My mom, le sigh. When I need to sound off, she listens, and then holds up a mirror so I can see where I failed in the situation. Is that a good thing? Maybe. If your mom can't tell you the difficult things, who can? I always think of all those moms in Amy Tan novels when I think about my relationship with my mother. Complicated and misunderstood.
And my brother and sister have been so needy throughout their lives, that they consume whatever time she has. I'm pretty self sufficient and I have a good husband and good in-laws, so she kind of leaves me to do my thing, but then she feels like I never need her for anything - so that hurts her feelings. She's there when I need her. But when she calls me, I know something's up. She never calls just to chat. That's a good thing too.
I worry about the kind of mom I am. I feel like Aurora Greenway - I baby my children way too much.
My mom is, and always has been, supportive of her children, and unconditionally loving. She didn't have an easy time - we didn't have much money, but she could take the small of amount that she had and turn it into something beautiful. And she does it without grumbling or worrying, which is so unlike me!! In ten minutes, I kid you not, while I'm whining and worrying about whether I put enough coffee into the coffee maker, or maybe I should add more, or will that be too strong, whine whine, she will have made a potato salad and set the table, and stuck a magnolia flower into a bowl of water as a centerpiece. She's very capable, but not aggressively so - just quietly productive and artistic and beautiful, in a way that doesn't ask for thanks or praise. If she ever dies (I've heard that happens, but I refuse to believe it), I will be lost.
I could go on for pages. I love her.
I could go on for pages. I love her.