No ma'am, not too personal at all. She actually lives about twenty miles west of where I live. It was weird chance meeting a few years ago. When my son started at a local daycare here when he was about three months old, late 2004 this would have been I ran into her. On his first day, I dropped him off and she (Brandy) was one of the day care workers. I ran into her as I was crossing the lobby of the daycare. We just stopped and stared at each other for a few seconds, as about 1 million thoughts ran thru my head on the spot I learned the true meaning of "Your emotions do not ask for permission." I just told her "hi", she said the same, we chatted for a few minutes, I found out she had a son also, about a year older than mine and was also married. The weirdness didn't start until I got back to my vehicle, I had a hard time keeping my eyes in focus and just this overwhelming feeling of depression wash over me which was very out of character for me. It wasn't because of jealously or anything, or maybe it was, I don't know. I was at that time and still am happily married to my wife, but it was just the shock of seeing Brandy and not expecting it.
We didn't really settle anything that night we broke up in 1993. It had been one of those weird, college type relationships, intense at some times, distant at others, but I had fallen head over heels for her and just didn't realize it. Probably the first girl I really fell in love with. I honestly don't even remember why we called it quits but I do remember I kept trying to make it not happen and the more I tried the further away she got from me. The Mazzy Star song comes into play because I had bought her the CD as a surprise the day before and when she accepted it, there was just this look of, I don't know, blankness on her face. Usually when we bought gifts for each other, we both tended to make a big deal out of it, like I said Danie, we were both in our early 20's, sappy, I know. Back then, all songs had meaning, I had this vision of us always being together, and the world was our oyster, 'ya know? After we broke up, I did the obligatory graveling on the phone to her a few times but it just made me feel worse, especially when I realized it wasn't doing any good. I quit hanging out with all of my friends, because my friends were also her friends and just the thought of seeing her made me want to start bawling my eyes out....again, silly I know. Anyway, time and distance had definitely helped but seeing her that day in the daycare lobby was just kind of surreal. You put emotions in a box over time and stomp them down until you can live with them but it doesn't seem to take much for them to spring right back to the forefront if the right conditions present themselves. Anyway, that's my sappy grunge era/college days break up story for what it's worth. Anyone reading this is most likely either asleep by now or planning on punching me square in the teeth if they ever see me in person for having to read such sludge...lol Have a good week ma'am.
