After I posted this, I had this horrifying thought that I may be confessing to some depraved act I'd never heard of. So I looked this up in the urban dictionary and it's there but it's not too bad. I was only making a utensil joke.
I actually laughed out loud! This is the sort of thing I would do, then hope no one else thought of it either, and wonder if that was why people kept looking at me funny. "Oh crap, it's that spork this isn't it? Should I say something, or would that just make it weirder?"
Off to the UD....