How do you deal with that troublesome bad apple who stinks up your barrel?
There's Always One in the Crowd
- Thread starter Patricia A
- Start date
-
This message board permanently closed on June 30th, 2020 at 4PM EDT and is no longer accepting new members.
I wasn't even thinking about you. But now that you mention it...... LMAOLordy... I'm not all that bad.
Naw, see I'm having a hard time getting along with a person I work with. I'm usually the peacemaker at work but this girl is riding my last nerve. Who makes peace for the peacemaker? Boo hoo.
I was wondering if anyone had any stories or advice concerning that "there's always one in the crowd" person they have to deal with.
Of course smartass remarks are quite good too, as laughter is the best medicine.
In my experience I've found that talking about stuff has a way of making stuff easier to deal with.
I was wondering if anyone had any stories or advice concerning that "there's always one in the crowd" person they have to deal with.
Of course smartass remarks are quite good too, as laughter is the best medicine.
In my experience I've found that talking about stuff has a way of making stuff easier to deal with.
Kill them with kindness is the best way to handle it. Smile and know that you have achieved a higher level than the jackass you are dealing with.
Naw, see I'm having a hard time getting along with a person I work with. I'm usually the peacemaker at work but this girl is riding my last nerve. Who makes peace for the peacemaker? Boo hoo.
I was wondering if anyone had any stories or advice concerning that "there's always one in the crowd" person they have to deal with.
Of course smartass remarks are quite good too, as laughter is the best medicine.
In my experience I've found that talking about stuff has a way of making stuff easier to deal with.
Depends on what the person is doing. If they're just generally annoying, I grit my teeth and ignore them. If they're doing something that can harm my reputation, first I talk to them: "When you do_____, it (makes me look bad, starts arguments, gets in the way of doing our jobs, etc.), and I don't appreciate that. Please stop." If that does no good, THEN I'd go to the next up in the chain of command. I'm a nice person, but I won't be torpedoed by an idiot.
Harder is if someone has a hygiene issue. I used to work with a guy nicknamed Stinky Pete...but no one (me included) could think of how to tell him. A boss finally had to take him aside and advise him that bathing and toothbrushing were not optional. I really sympathized with her--what a horrible position to be in!
See, my problem is I have no poker face. It's easy for me to be kind to most people because I really feel kindness toward them. I am trying to do that, as really that's the best thing to do. But I smile at her and I think it looks like I'm trying to take a poop. I am polite and professional with her but I can hear the edge in everything I say when I speak to her.
I have to train her to do some of the creative work in our store and I don't want to.
Maybe you can write an outline of the training and just go over it with her, limit talk one on one time.
I was going to make a smarty pants remark (Kill 'em! Kill 'em with FIRE!) but that's not my style. 
I remember when I called my Daddy (I was 18 yrs old, out on my own) and complaining my office manager was awful. AWFUL!!
He said, "Mija, every organization has a head, backbone, right arm, left arm, etc., and that ONE a**hole. It stinks but don't poke it."
I remember when I called my Daddy (I was 18 yrs old, out on my own) and complaining my office manager was awful. AWFUL!!
He said, "Mija, every organization has a head, backbone, right arm, left arm, etc., and that ONE a**hole. It stinks but don't poke it."
She told the store manager that when I was instructing her I made her feel stupid. She said I was mean to her and not a very good instructor. Nobody has ever complained about me being mean before. I am patient and remember what it felt like to be new when I'm training. I don't ever bully folks, ever.
She has not liked me since about a week after she started there, she was saying something ugly about one of the other new people. I asked her not to do that. She kept insisting on telling me what a loser this other person was. I told her that the conversation was over, and told her that I don't gossip about people. If she had a real complaint about someone she should take it to the manager..... so she did and it was me she complained about.
Here's another odd twist in the tale. She and the manager are as thick as thieves and two peas in a pod. Our manager doesn't like anyone! But of all people she likes this girl!
I was going to make a smarty pants remark (Kill 'em! Kill 'em with FIRE!) but that's not my style.
I remember when I called my Daddy (I was 18 yrs old, out on my own) and complaining my office manager was awful. AWFUL!!
He said, "Mija, every organization has a head, backbone, right arm, left arm, etc., and that ONE a**hole. It stinks but don't poke it."
AAARRRRGH! I HATE people like that. There is no winning this war, if she's schmoopsy-poopsy with the boss. About all you can do is be polite and professional, and avoid her as much as possible. I'm so sorry.
That's precisely the protocol I've used in the work force and it has served me well most of the time, Skimom. Very good advice.
I've never understood why some people find it so hard to be professional, be polite, and get the job done. Then go home. It's not your life, it's a PART of your life. Gossip and backbiting is the reason I despise working with women. Yeah, I know some men do that, too, but they seem to be able to get in, get out, and go home, without making everything personal.
I agree with skimom.
You can't win for losing.
(If she gets really, really bad, PM me. We can make up all kinds of horrible names for her!
)
Good advice. I have my good reputation to fall back on if this gets any worse. I really don't want to give her so much of my energy, and get nothing back but negativity, if that makes sense. I love my job and I'm damned good at it. So I'll just keep my head down, do my work and wait for her to go away.
Thanks guys! I feel better already!
Just so you know skimom2, you're one smart cookie.
She's got her head up your manager's butt, so no matter what you do you're not going to change the situation. I've been dealing with this exact same issue at work for about three years now- my blood pressure literally elevates 10 points when I am around this sniveling, butt-kissing, back-stabbing little b*tch of a woman, but since her head is so far up my management team's butt that she literally can speak for said managers, there's nothing I can do about it. This particular co-worker's tactics (she somehow manages to get all members of management to do her work for her!) and *ss-kissing has caused a huge divide among my co-workers. Most of them see what's going on and despise her for it, but with the placement of her head in the rectal area of management, there's just nothing we can do.