Things Mr. King Will Not Do For You......

[staropeace]

He will not personally sign your novel unless you meet him at a book-signing event or a con.
He does not have the time to read one of your stories or listen to one of your story ideas.
He will not "make an exception" for you because, then, he would have to make exceptions for everyone.
He really does not care if you dislike the ending of some of his books or the swear words in them. He writes for himself ...the honest way any writer should write.
The only way Mr. King can make your life richer is by reaching out to you with his writings. In order to keep HIS life richer, he needs his privacy and family time.

Just so that you know. Nuff said.

 

[Winter]

OK, I get that....but surely just for me he would read my short story? Its great..maybe then he could sign it...and return it. Perhaps with a photo. A signed photo.
I'll make a deal. I will send him MY signed photo, along with my story...so its fair.

Now, seriously I know whats probably prompted you to say this...and really, isnt it shocking some people need to be TOLD this? Good post Staro!

 

[jacobtlong]

But I gots a good story... Read my story, Mr. King.

 

[staropeace]

I was just getting sick of people asking for impossible things on this board....and not being happy when they do not get it. LOL

 

[Winter]

But I gots a good story... Read my story, Mr. King.

Look here, he cant make an exception for you AND me..plus I offered a signed photo.

 

[Neesy]

I was just getting sick of people asking for impossible things on this board....and not being happy when they do not get it. LOL

I would like him to come to my house and install that big metal door on the garage that goes up and down
(okay - second choice - Walter Oobleck) more his line of work actually)

 

[staropeace]

I figured you were gonna ask him to do that since your Scot went back up north to sling the mighty hash.

 

[Jordan]

StephenKing.com - Frequently Asked Questions has some additional information, too .

 

[Neesy]

I figured you were gonna ask him to do that since your Scot went back up north to sling the mighty hash.

He's keeping the Inuit well fed Staro - you'll be able to compare recipes if you ever meet up

 

[staropeace]

StephenKing.com - Frequently Asked Questions has some additional information, too .

You are right. Now if they would just read the darn things lol.

 

[kingricefan]

Will he come to my house and vacuum? It's not in the 'will not do' list so thought I'd ask. I have two cats. Need I say more?

 

[Dana Jean]

Will he come to my house and vacuum? It's not in the 'will not do' list so thought I'd ask. I have two cats. Need I say more?

iRobots are great for cat hair. I have two cats also and I love my iRobot.

 

[ghost19]

He will not personally sign your novel unless you meet him at a book-signing event or a con.
He does not have the time to read one of your stories or listen to one of your story ideas.
He will not "make an exception" for you because, then, he would have to make exceptions for everyone.
He really does not care if you dislike the ending of some of his books or the swear words in them. He writes for himself ...the honest way any writer should write.
The only way Mr. King can make your life richer is by reaching out to you with his writings. In order to keep HIS life richer, he needs his privacy and family time.

Just so that you know. Nuff said.

Oh this post is priceless!!! U Rock ma'am.

 

[kingricefan]

iRobots are great for cat hair. I have two cats also and I love my iRobot.

They would so freak out on that! I would have to pull them off of the ceiling with a crowbar!

 

[kingricefan]

He will not personally sign your novel unless you meet him at a book-signing event or a con.
He does not have the time to read one of your stories or listen to one of your story ideas.
He will not "make an exception" for you because, then, he would have to make exceptions for everyone.
He really does not care if you dislike the ending of some of his books or the swear words in them. He writes for himself ...the honest way any writer should write.
The only way Mr. King can make your life richer is by reaching out to you with his writings. In order to keep HIS life richer, he needs his privacy and family time.

Just so that you know. Nuff said.

This needs to be re-posted in the 'Newbies' section!!

 

[Dana Jean]

They would so freak out on that! I would have to pull them off of the ceiling with a crowbar!

No, they might for a couple days. But it really keeps that cat hair down! My one cat was scared of it, so he'd go to the bedroom, the other cat felt it was his duty to wrangle it around and keep it on task. He would move as it moved. Actually, it's good exercise for him. He weighs 15.6 pounds and needs to keep his figure.

 

[blunthead]

He will not cut yer grass for you unless you offer him some tea.

He will not shave yer head for you.

He will not prance.

He will not cheat on a math test.

He will not claim to have won an Academy Award.

 

[kingricefan]

He will not cut yer grass for you unless you offer him some tea.

He will not shave yer head for you.

He will not prance.

He will not cheat on a math test.

He will not claim to have won an Academy Award.

But will he PRANCERSIZE??? (look it up on Youtube if ya don't know what it is)

 

[Dana Jean]

But will he PRANCERSIZE??? (look it up on Youtube if ya don't know what it is)

I love the queen of prancersize. She makes me laugh!

 

[Jordan]