Zombie Apocalypse in Kansas?

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Houdini

Well-Known Member
Aug 15, 2014
295
1,418
USA
Worried about the coming "Zombie Apocalypse?" Want to know what to do about it? Well, besides attempting to get all the helpful hints from "World War Z" and "The Walking Dead" that you can, you can head out to Kansas, the state that just declared October "Zombie Preparedness Month."
The Inquistr reported Sept. 26 that Kansas, in an effort to get its citizens in the right frame of mind for disaster awareness and preparedness, declared the October "Zombie Preparedness Month" in the hopes that the pop culture phenomenon of zombie worship will increase participation in the readiness campaign for real world disasters like floods, blizzards, tornadoes, earthquakes, and the like. The prevailing opinion of state officials is that if one is prepared for a zombie apocalypse or similar scenario, one should be prepared for just about any type of catastrophe.
According to a press release from the Adjutant General's Office of the state of Kansas, Gov. Sam Brownback signed the "Zombie Preparedness Month" proclamation Sept. 26. With a nod to the popularity of zombies, the release noted that the Kansas of Division of Emergency Management was intent on utilizing the popularity of said undead to encourage Kansans to prepare for emergencies.
“If you’re prepared for zombies, you’re prepared for anything” is the theme behind the zombie apocalypse preparedness campaign.
“If you’re equipped to handle the zombie apocalypse then you’re prepared for tornadoes, severe storms, fire and any other natural disaster Kansas usually faces,” one Kansas state official said. “This is a fun and low-stress way to get families involved, and past turnouts have proven it to be effective.”
So… just how does one really go about preparing for a zombie apocalypse? Well, basically the same way one would prepare for a catastrophic tornado strike or a devastating flood. The first two things everyone needs are emergency home kits with survival supplies that will last at least three days and an emergency plan. There's more of course, so for Kansans -- and non-Kansans -- you are directed to www.ksready.gov for more preparedness information.
Still, Kansas isn't the first government entity to embrace the zombie idea to help get the message out about being disaster-ready. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta issued a plan for preparedness in case of a zombie apocalypse in 2011, much to the bemusement of mainstream media. But their point then was the same as Kansas' is now: basic preparedness for one disaster is preparedness for all.
It was also revealed in May that the Pentagon had commissioned battle plans that included various doomsday scenarios involving zombies. The actual documents were submitted in 2011 with a summary that read, in part, that the report "fulfills fictional contingency planning . . . to undertake military operations to preserve 'non-zombie' humans from the threats posed by a zombie horde."
So… it's really all about disaster readiness. Belief in zombies -- or using them as a fictitious motivator -- is optional. So is going to Kansas.

Houdini in Omaha
 

DiO'Bolic

Not completely obtuse
Nov 14, 2013
22,864
129,998
Poconos, PA
We’ve already got a zombie apocalypse going on just about everywhere. We’ve all seen them. Walking around with a blank stare gazing into their smartphone. No conservation, no interaction, oblivious to everything, blindly walking in front of moving cars, walking into obstacles and falling down stairs. I think they’re called iZombies. :)
 

Houdini

Well-Known Member
Aug 15, 2014
295
1,418
USA
We’ve already got a zombie apocalypse going on just about everywhere. We’ve all seen them. Walking around with a blank stare gazing into their smartphone. No conservation, no interaction, oblivious to everything, blindly walking in front of moving cars, walking into obstacles and falling down stairs. I think they’re called iZombies. :)

One of my favorite retro Sega Genesis games was "Zombies Ate My Neighbors". The current crop of video games have no real sense of humor. :)

Houdini in Omaha
 

arista

First time caller long time listener
Jul 10, 2006
12,360
45,658
123
Indiana, USA
We’ve already got a zombie apocalypse going on just about everywhere. We’ve all seen them. Walking around with a blank stare gazing into their smartphone. No conservation, no interaction, oblivious to everything, blindly walking in front of moving cars, walking into obstacles and falling down stairs. I think they’re called iZombies. :)
You say true!!
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
62
Cambridge, Ohio
...my son is stationed there, so he may get in on the fun...he's my boy-so that kind of twisted event would be right up his alley...my preparedness only amounts to checking the various clips to see if they're fully loaded...well that, and hijacking an Archway cookie truck....
 

swiftdog2.0

I tell you one and one makes three...
Mar 16, 2010
7,095
35,344
Macroverse
...my son is stationed there, so he may get in on the fun...he's my boy-so that kind of twisted event would be right up his alley...my preparedness only amounts to checking the various clips to see if they're fully loaded...well that, and hijacking an Archway cookie truck....

When I was getting my License To Carry the licensing officer in my town asked me why I wanted it. I told him it was for all lawful purposes and that I was preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse. He was not amused :( Some cops have no sense of humor............
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
62
Cambridge, Ohio
When I was getting my License To Carry the licensing officer in my town asked me why I wanted it. I told him it was for all lawful purposes and that I was preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse. He was not amused :( Some cops have no sense of humor............
...should have told him, you wanted to lawfully conceal-because you had a big drug deal to get to...
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
62
Cambridge, Ohio
25072901.jpg
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
62
Cambridge, Ohio
LOL!

One of the questions they ask is if you are afllliated with any gangs or organized crime. I asked the guy if anyone ever answered "yes". Again, he was not amused.
...same thing when they ask if you've ever been found mentally incompetent...just look at em real stupid, and go "I ain't incompetent-I done fathered 4 kids and a puppy"...again, they will not be amused...