Gross me out, man!

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HollyGolightly

Well-Known Member
Sep 6, 2013
9,660
74,320
54
Heart of the South
I'll go first.

I was eating at a breakfast buffet with my sister in law at a swanky hotel. Suddenly she screams, "Don't close your mouth!" I love her and trust her in all the things, so I leave my mouthful of eggs wide open. She reaches over and pulls a hair out of my mouth that's all entangled with a big bite of scrambled eggs. :barf:

I had to go vomit while she complained to management and we left without paying. Of course, we didn't eat either, so there's that.

Two years later I still can't eat scrambled eggs.

I also have a pigeon story, but I won't dominate.

Anyone want to share some grossness?
 

Out of Order

Sign of the Times
Feb 9, 2011
29,007
162,154
New Hampster
We were at a local restaurant one time and decided to get the salad bar to go along with dinner. We proceeded to get in line and watched in horror as a rather large woman in front of us scratched her ass
Yes, right in the crack does it do ya?
and then use the utensils to fill her plate up. Needless to say we exited the joint, but not after telling the waitress they might want to call in an air strike to disinfect the place.
 

HollyGolightly

Well-Known Member
Sep 6, 2013
9,660
74,320
54
Heart of the South
We were at a local restaurant one time and decided to get the salad bar to go along with dinner. We proceeded to get in line and watched in horror as a rather large woman in front of us scratched her ass
Yes, right in the crack does it do ya?
and then use the utensils to fill her plate up. Needless to say we exited the joint, but not after telling the waitress they might want to call in an air strike to disinfect the place.
LOL
Pinworms!!
images
 

fljoe0

Cantre Member
Apr 5, 2008
15,859
71,642
62
120 miles S of the Pancake/Waffle line
This is so gross that I had to do it twice ;-D

1 - I was playing golf on a small par 3 course (It's a driving range, mini golf and small par 3 course all in the same location) and I hit a ball in the woods. I went into the woods to look for it and stepped in human poop. :barf:I left my shoes in the woods and finished my round with no shoes (looked like a real redneck on the golf course with no shoes ;-D)

2- Fast forward a year or so - I have to go to my office to get something on a Sunday morning. We had a locked gate with a padlock that you had to unlock to get to the building. Anyway, I pull up to the gate, step out of my truck and step directly in human poop. We were in a bit of an out of the way place, so I guess someone was driving around the industrial park the night before and had to go. Again, I went home with no shoes on.

I don't know anyone that has done this once and I have done it twice now. ;-D:barf:
 

HollyGolightly

Well-Known Member
Sep 6, 2013
9,660
74,320
54
Heart of the South
This is so gross that I had to do it twice ;-D

1 - I was playing golf on a small par 3 course (It's a driving range, mini golf and small par 3 course all in the same location) and I hit a ball in the woods. I went into the woods to look for it and stepped in human poop. :barf:I left my shoes in the woods and finished my round with no shoes (looked like a real redneck on the golf course with no shoes ;-D)

2- Fast forward a year or so - I have to go to my office to get something on a Sunday morning. We had a locked gate with a padlock that you had to unlock to get to the building. Anyway, I pull up to the gate, step out of my truck and step directly in human poop. We were in a bit of an out of the way place, so I guess someone was driving around the industrial park the night before and had to go. Again, I went home with no shoes on.

I don't know anyone that has done this once and I have done it twice now. ;-D:barf:
:shock:
Where do you live that people poop outdoors like that? I have to say, I've seen it done down the alleys in Memphis though. Homeless and insane, methinks.
 

Out of Order

Sign of the Times
Feb 9, 2011
29,007
162,154
New Hampster
This is so gross that I had to do it twice ;-D

1 - I was playing golf on a small par 3 course (It's a driving range, mini golf and small par 3 course all in the same location) and I hit a ball in the woods. I went into the woods to look for it and stepped in human poop. :barf:I left my shoes in the woods and finished my round with no shoes (looked like a real redneck on the golf course with no shoes ;-D)

2- Fast forward a year or so - I have to go to my office to get something on a Sunday morning. We had a locked gate with a padlock that you had to unlock to get to the building. Anyway, I pull up to the gate, step out of my truck and step directly in human poop. We were in a bit of an out of the way place, so I guess someone was driving around the industrial park the night before and had to go. Again, I went home with no shoes on.

I don't know anyone that has done this once and I have done it twice now. ;-D:barf:

You know how things come in threes right?
 

Grandpa

Well-Known Member
Mar 2, 2014
9,724
53,642
Colorado
Still remember this, as a kid, reaching into the cupboard, pulling out a box of raisins, grabbing a handful for a snack, popping them in my mouth, realizing something weird was going on, reached in my mouth and pulled out a maggot. The rest of the mouthful went shooting into the sink about .5 seconds later.


This isn't gross, but we were at a ... Chili's, I think? And I'd ordered a boneless chicken platter, and I kept hitting, yup, little bitty bones. I kept extracting them from my mouth and assembled a little pile on a napkin. Just as a courtesy to the establishment, told the waitress about it, that they might want to check with their food supplier.

She was horrified at the pile. "Oh, I'm so sorry!"
"No problem. You just might want to check with your food supplier."

A minute later, the manager is at the table, apologizing like crazy.
"No problem. You just might want to check with your food supplier."
"May I pay for your meal, sir?"
"No, the meal was tasty. I just ran into these bones. I thought you might want to check with your food supplier."

He motioned to the napkin, not touching it. "May I take these, sir?"
"Chicken bones? Sure. Knock yourself out."
He folded the napkin and picked it up like it contained a donated organ.

"Are you sure I can't buy your meal, sir?"
"No, I pay my way. Good luck with your food supplier."
"Thank you, sir. I'm sorry, sir."

Evidently, they are sensitive to these issues.
 

DiO'Bolic

Not completely obtuse
Nov 14, 2013
22,864
129,998
Poconos, PA
A regular occurrence for me. We have three cats that my family thought would be a wonderful thing to rescue two from the shelter and the third who showed up as a kitten on our back porch near death’s door. 5:00 am every morning they are screaming to be fed. I stumble out of bed in a groggy state of mind to go feed them. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve stepped in a wet hairball in my bare feet that they strategically place only in my pathway. I just love cats... almost as much as those miserable loud dirty squawking parakeets we have. :(
 

EMTP513

Well-Known Member
Oct 31, 2012
503
1,923
You must be joking. I'm a Paramedic, gross is almost all I ever see. I wouldn't even know where to start.
When I think I'm talking about something I can handle, at least while I'm working on it I can endure it, other people get so upset by what I'm saying that they don't even want to hear it.
I never know when that will be either, or even what will set it off.
The one thing that's beyond gross is intubation of nonbreathing and dysapneic patients (those who are having so much difficulty breathing that they need an intubation tube; most people have no idea that when you try to visualize their vocal cords, you're also seeing great gobs of phlegm and/or other disgusting body fluids, especially when the person has whooping cough. The bacteria that cause all these illnesses are disgusting beyond belief. Suctioning out phlegm is also disgusting and seeing patients spit out giant wads of it is revolting.
I can handle seeing almost anything (except grey matter) but the aromas are god-awful, especially when you mix alcohol with vomit. There's absolutely no way I can stand it without breathing through my mouth. And doing it shallowly because the odor turns into a taste when you breathe through your mouth. Then the odor lingers even after you've cleaned up their mess.
This is why I hate alcoholic overdoses. That and the fact that the patient is almost always mean as cat dirt.

My least favorite job is picking up body parts and putting them on Zero Ice so they can be reattached later at the hospital.
This, incidentally, is why I'll never like zombie movies. I see most of that every week I go to work. I don't want to see it in my entertainment too, especially since the filmmakers' idea of what all this stuff looks like is mostly a joke IMO. Some of the movies have improved, like the one where blood from the jugular vein came out sideways instead of straight down, but most don't know those things or they refuse to include it as a medical detail. Most viewers don't care if that detail is correct, but I was impressed that they knew to add it.
 

mustangclaire

There's petrol runnin' through my veins.
Jun 15, 2010
2,956
12,726
52
East Sussex, UK
I used to run pubs. One particular chef we used to take with us from place to place was a stout Scottish girl called Sarah. She often used to kip over with us after a few drinks at the bar and the punters had gone home. She ALWAYS mixed her drinks. Anyway I left her sitting up chatting with my husband one night, and went to bed. In the morning I got up, went through into the living room and put my dressing gown on. Put my hand in the pocket and felt something cold and lumpy in there. Turned out she'd woken up feeling sick, and thrown up neatly into the pocket of my dressing gown :down: