RIP GNTLGNT's dad

  • This message board permanently closed on June 30th, 2020 at 4PM EDT and is no longer accepting new members.

Notaro

Stark Raving Normal
Mar 23, 2007
1,135
7,321
58
Dublin/Ireland
Oh my! How tragic. I'm so sorry for your losses.

It was a lifetime ago, almost seems like it happened to someone else
Oh my! How tragic. I'm so sorry for your losses.

Thank you, mine was a lifetime ago, hopefully with love and support Scott will get through this difficult time.
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
62
Cambridge, Ohio
It was a lifetime ago, almost seems like it happened to someone else


Thank you, mine was a lifetime ago, hopefully with love and support Scott will get through this difficult time.
....I grieve for your losses to my brother-remote though they may be.....all of the support shown to me here simply once again proves how uniquely wonderful this group is....and please, don't feel that I'm wallowing in pity or tears....I have my expected good and bad days....tomorrow is going to be one of the rough ones, as we have an auctioneer coming to the house to give us an idea of how to go about a much needed sale of things....I know it's necessary...I can't hold onto everything-just that in my weaker moments, I feel I'm casting my parents out and away...if that makes any sense....
 

Notaro

Stark Raving Normal
Mar 23, 2007
1,135
7,321
58
Dublin/Ireland
....I grieve for your losses to my brother-remote though they may be.....all of the support shown to me here simply once again proves how uniquely wonderful this group is....and please, don't feel that I'm wallowing in pity or tears....I have my expected good and bad days....tomorrow is going to be one of the rough ones, as we have an auctioneer coming to the house to give us an idea of how to go about a much needed sale of things....I know it's necessary...I can't hold onto everything-just that in my weaker moments, I feel I'm casting my parents out and away...if that makes any sense....

After my mom and sister passed my dad stayed in the house for a couple of years then he decided to sell, it had stopped being a home, it was just a house again. Holding on to their possessions felt like the right thing to do but then I came to the realisation that looking at their clothes and jewellery and other things sitting in the drawers and wardrobes and closets isn't going to help me remember them, I don't need those things for that, so wouldn't it be better to part with those things and see that they go to some people who will actually need them and make use of them and who's lives might be improved just a little bit by having them. That was our logic for parting with their belongings. It was an emotional process but it did help us.
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
62
Cambridge, Ohio
After my mom and sister passed my dad stayed in the house for a couple of years then he decided to sell, it had stopped being a home, it was just a house again. Holding on to their possessions felt like the right thing to do but then I came to the realisation that looking at their clothes and jewellery and other things sitting in the drawers and wardrobes and closets isn't going to help me remember them, I don't need those things for that, so wouldn't it be better to part with those things and see that they go to some people who will actually need them and make use of them and who's lives might be improved just a little bit by having them. That was our logic for parting with their belongings. It was an emotional process but it did help us.
...you speak true, and I know that, I truly do....they will always be alive in my heart and mind....plus, all the clothes and housewares have gone to our local Salvation Army, thereby enabling some part of my folks to help others in need....
 

Spideyman

Uber Member
Jul 10, 2006
46,336
195,472
79
Just north of Duma Key
....I grieve for your losses to my brother-remote though they may be.....all of the support shown to me here simply once again proves how uniquely wonderful this group is....and please, don't feel that I'm wallowing in pity or tears....I have my expected good and bad days....tomorrow is going to be one of the rough ones, as we have an auctioneer coming to the house to give us an idea of how to go about a much needed sale of things....I know it's necessary...I can't hold onto everything-just that in my weaker moments, I feel I'm casting my parents out and away...if that makes any sense....
Scott, I have been through this experience. I see you have donated to a good cause and yes, others will reap from what was given. One way to look at an estate sale is this-- every treasure your parents had meant something special to them. Now they will pass these treasures ( in a monitory form ) to you, their son, via a sale.
In turn, you will use this gift of love and memories to help your children and grandchildren. Their treasures, possessions will live on, making life a little easier for all. Think of it as your parent's last gift to you and your family, not as a loss.
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
62
Cambridge, Ohio
Scott, I have been through this experience. I see you have donated to a good cause and yes, others will reap from what was given. One way to look at an estate sale is this-- every treasure your parents had meant something special to them. Now they will pass these treasures ( in a monitory form ) to you, their son, via a sale.
In turn, you will use this gift of love and memories to help your children and grandchildren. Their treasures, possessions will live on, making life a little easier for all. Think of it as your parent's last gift to you and your family, not as a loss.
...OK, that one made me cry darlin' but your words are so very wise and comforting....thank you for that.....
 

thekidd12

Baseball is a good thing.Always was,always will be
Apr 8, 2016
1,791
11,136
60
NC
I am late to this, not because I do not care, but instead I empathize too much...My father will be gone 5 years on December 4th sometime around 3:15...I, like many others have said, understand exactly what you are going through...Truthfully I miss him every day but I see him every day as well...Something his grandchildren, my offspring, say or do or in the way they look at me...Heck I even say some of the things exactly like he did back when I would roll my eyes at him...I feel for you big guy...The numbness will ease off eventually but it takes some time...As a wise man once said, and I am paraphrasing "You will never forget the face of your father"...