Mammalia amusmenta anorexia ...
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Mammalia amusmenta anorexia ...
This is greatALERTS TO THREATS IN 2017 EUROPE - From JOHN CLEESE
The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.
Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.
The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Ba----rds." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.
The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.
Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides.”
The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose.”
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brusselsʼ.
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be right, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the last final escalation level.
Regards,
John Cleese,
British writer, actor and tall person
ALERTS TO THREATS IN 2017 EUROPE - From JOHN CLEESE
The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent events in Syria and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.
Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.
The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Ba----rds." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.
The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.
Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides.”
The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose.”
Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brusselsʼ.
The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.
Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be right, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is cancelled." So far no situation has ever warranted use of the last final escalation level.
Regards,
John Cleese,
British writer, actor and tall person
19,000 into ask mr Foster short story, (novella territory)if anybody wants to help me out and read it through for plot holes i'd be a very happy bunny.
it's a love story - sorta , but kind of came off the rails and jumped into the sci fi track, before coming to a halt on the WTF station.
i'm having a hard time steering this one to a conclusion, i have one, it's just over the wall at the moment.
thanking you kindly.
its called Ask Mr. Foster ? I will be over there later and bookmark it and be checking it out !
19,000 into ask mr Foster short story, (novella territory)if anybody wants to help me out and read it through for plot holes i'd be a very happy bunny.
it's a love story - sorta , but kind of came off the rails and jumped into the sci fi track, before coming to a halt on the WTF station.
i'm having a hard time steering this one to a conclusion, i have one, it's just over the wall at the moment.
thanking you kindly.
thanks maddie, the draft over here-
Ask Mr Foster – SHORT STORIES
is just the first few drafted pages.
if you are still interested after that, i'll pm you the rest of the blurb. up to the final chapter, which i'm still working on.
cheers mate.
Yes, I would like the nod when you complete writing of 'Ask Mr. Foster'. What truly amazing storytelling! Its very captivating and I was aaawww when I reached the end of the draft to find that I have to wait for more. We always know when the writer is writing just for us. I think it is greater than science fiction, I believe there is more of an extraordinarily paranormal element to what feels like a dark and chilling romance creeping into it. Its very mysterious.
and as for 'STACEY WALLBECKER'? She blew my mind! WOW. that is my Favorite! Its your best to me so far. You had me actually Laughing out loud in parts of that, with all the Horror going on and I absolutely Loved it! Extremely nicely done you. ; )
I hope everyone can check it out, Sheemiee's short story 'Stacey Wallbecker' its here ...
Stacey Wallbecker – SHORT STORIES