Motivation

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DiO'Bolic

Not completely obtuse
Nov 14, 2013
22,864
129,998
Poconos, PA
Motivation - ugh. Many years ago I wanted to stop smoking, but since I was young and healthy it was hard to convince myself that there would someday be consequences. It was finally out of vanity that I quit - I hated smelling like an ashtray.

Last year I wanted to lose weight, but couldn't find the motivation. In my twenties I was motivated by the search for a romantic partner, but now I've been married 20+ years and my husband didn't seem to mind that I looked like a turnip. I minded, but couldn't stick to anything. I decided to invent an imaginary boyfriend that I'd be meeting for the first time a few months down the road. However, I'm not that stupid. So then, I decided I needed to find someone local to have a "crush" on - a real, live person who I'd really run into every few weeks. Well, this really worked! I chose someone who I found totally unattractive (because I didn't want to really have a crush on someone), and made it like a game - it became easier to stick to the diet plan knowing I'd see this guy every couple of weeks, and even though he looked like a turnip, it was a victory when I realized that I was 5-10 pounds lighter whenever I saw him. But then, guess what? I wound up really getting a crush on him - he was a turnip, but very smart and funny. That was okay, it only added to the motivation. But then I started blushing furiously whenever I ran into him at the Winn Dixie, and it just caused me a lot of embarrassment (not to mention guilt, because I'm married). So then, I had to convince myself that although I was 25+ pounds thinner, it was totally unacceptable for me to have a crush on someone I had to see around town - I'd have to try to go back to believing that Clive Owen was my boyfriend, which didn't work, and I gained 15 pounds.

So, my "Imaginary Boyfriend Diet" was a fail. Any advice on finding and keeping motivation would be appreciated!
Take up smoking again. ;)
 
Last edited:

Neesy

#1 fan (Annie Wilkes cousin) 1st cousin Mom's side
May 24, 2012
61,289
239,271
Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
1408381701903


Motivation? - Retirement in 2 1/2 years if all goes well! (it keeps me going to work)
 
Mar 12, 2010
6,538
29,004
Texas
Motivation - ugh. Many years ago I wanted to stop smoking, but since I was young and healthy it was hard to convince myself that there would someday be consequences. It was finally out of vanity that I quit - I hated smelling like an ashtray.

Last year I wanted to lose weight, but couldn't find the motivation. In my twenties I was motivated by the search for a romantic partner, but now I've been married 20+ years and my husband didn't seem to mind that I looked like a turnip. I minded, but couldn't stick to anything. I decided to invent an imaginary boyfriend that I'd be meeting for the first time a few months down the road. However, I'm not that stupid. So then, I decided I needed to find someone local to have a "crush" on - a real, live person who I'd really run into every few weeks. Well, this really worked! I chose someone who I found totally unattractive (because I didn't want to really have a crush on someone), and made it like a game - it became easier to stick to the diet plan knowing I'd see this guy every couple of weeks, and even though he looked like a turnip, it was a victory when I realized that I was 5-10 pounds lighter whenever I saw him. But then, guess what? I wound up really getting a crush on him - he was a turnip, but very smart and funny. That was okay, it only added to the motivation. But then I started blushing furiously whenever I ran into him at the Winn Dixie, and it just caused me a lot of embarrassment (not to mention guilt, because I'm married). So then, I had to convince myself that although I was 25+ pounds thinner, it was totally unacceptable for me to have a crush on someone I had to see around town - I'd have to try to go back to believing that Clive Owen was my boyfriend, which didn't work, and I gained 15 pounds.

So, my "Imaginary Boyfriend Diet" was a fail. Any advice on finding and keeping motivation would be appreciated!

lmao! :rofl: Like Ms Mod, I was thinking about adopting your plan... until you said it failed lol. My only weight loss motivation is the fact that none of the really cute clothes come in plus sizes.
 

SusanNorton

Beatle Groupie
Jul 12, 2006
4,518
8,317
Here, there and everywhere.
I got all excited thinking you'd given me my magic pill for dieting as I'm in a similar predicament with already having a partner who's fine with me as I am. But after reading the rest of your story (hilarious as always BTW), realize I'm going to have to go back to square one which means digging out the Weight Watchers program material (I, too, am a lifetime member who's fallen off the wagon) and do it the old-fashioned way, i.e. eat the right foods in an appropriate portion size, drink more water, and exercise. Bummer :down:

;-D Well, I still had to do the work, it was just easier to do with the imaginary boyfriend carrot dangling in front of me - wait, that sounds so wrong!

I'm doing Four Hour Body - it's a "slow carb" diet, and I had a lot of success with it, it's just keeping the motivation going that's difficult, especially when I reach a weight I'm kinda okay with.
 

SusanNorton

Beatle Groupie
Jul 12, 2006
4,518
8,317
Here, there and everywhere.
lmao! :rofl: Like Ms Mod, I was thinking about adopting your plan... until you said it failed lol. My only weight loss motivation is the fact that none of the really cute clothes come in plus sizes.

I know - don't get me started. But we'd probably look like this if we wore the "cute" clothes while chubby:

biscuits.jpg
 

skimom2

Just moseyin' through...
Oct 9, 2013
15,683
92,168
USA
I got all excited thinking you'd given me my magic pill for dieting as I'm in a similar predicament with already having a partner who's fine with me as I am. But after reading the rest of your story (hilarious as always BTW), realize I'm going to have to go back to square one which means digging out the Weight Watchers program material (I, too, am a lifetime member who's fallen off the wagon) and do it the old-fashioned way, i.e. eat the right foods in an appropriate portion size, drink more water, and exercise. Bummer :down:

Be comforted: I was reading yesterday that none of the faddish things now (paleo, Atkins, cabbage soup, whatever silly stuff is currently in fashion) works over time as well as WW or a doctor-prescribed diet (Likely because those are not meant as a short term 'fix', but as the proper way to eat for life).
 

Moderator

Ms. Mod
Administrator
Jul 10, 2006
52,243
157,324
Maine
Be comforted: I was reading yesterday that none of the faddish things now (paleo, Atkins, cabbage soup, whatever silly stuff is currently in fashion) works over time as well as WW or a doctor-prescribed diet (Likely because those are not meant as a short term 'fix', but as the proper way to eat for life).
It really has been the most successful for me in spite of my frequent yo-yoing but that's my fault not their plan. I think the reason why WW works for me is that there are no restrictions on what you eat as long as you factor in the points. Most other diets make you give up certain foods and when I'm feeling deprived, I'm less likely to stick with it long-term. My biggest complaint is that it takes so much longer to take the weight off than it does to put it on especially post menopause. I truly cannot lose weight as quickly simply by dieting or exercising like I could before and I've always been a more sedentary person so it's not like my burning calories through movement has changed. Nearly every woman I've commiserated with who is at that stage in life has the same problem, though.
 

arista

First time caller long time listener
Jul 10, 2006
12,360
45,658
123
Indiana, USA
It really has been the most successful for me in spite of my frequent yo-yoing but that's my fault not their plan. I think the reason why WW works for me is that there are no restrictions on what you eat as long as you factor in the points. Most other diets make you give up certain foods and when I'm feeling deprived, I'm less likely to stick with it long-term. My biggest complaint is that it takes so much longer to take the weight off than it does to put it on especially post menopause. I truly cannot lose weight as quickly simply by dieting or exercising like I could before and I've always been a more sedentary person so it's not like my burning calories through movement has changed. Nearly every woman I've commiserated with who is at that stage in life has the same problem, though.
I concur-When I was in my twenties, could just think about losing weight and it happened. The older I get the more difficult it becomes to lose weight. I exercise and try to eat right. Just difficult. :(
 

skimom2

Just moseyin' through...
Oct 9, 2013
15,683
92,168
USA
It really has been the most successful for me in spite of my frequent yo-yoing but that's my fault not their plan. I think the reason why WW works for me is that there are no restrictions on what you eat as long as you factor in the points. Most other diets make you give up certain foods and when I'm feeling deprived, I'm less likely to stick with it long-term. My biggest complaint is that it takes so much longer to take the weight off than it does to put it on especially post menopause. I truly cannot lose weight as quickly simply by dieting or exercising like I could before and I've always been a more sedentary person so it's not like my burning calories through movement has changed. Nearly every woman I've commiserated with who is at that stage in life has the same problem, though.

Yeah, I agree. It is more difficult to stay at a consistent weight as we age, and harder to take off extra weight. I've had the best results just by fitness walking (twice a day is best, but no way am I trying to walk fast on ice--in winter, I do once a day walking DVD and call it good) and using the MyFitnessPal food and exercise tracker. Always supposing I'm not inclined to lie (and who the heck am I lying to but myself? lol), seeing the numbers keeps me honest. Having said that, I'm brooding over my stupid ankle right now; not being able to fitness walk since before Christmas=5 lb weight gain. Not happy about having to take that back off.
 

Moderator

Ms. Mod
Administrator
Jul 10, 2006
52,243
157,324
Maine
Yeah, I agree. It is more difficult to stay at a consistent weight as we age, and harder to take off extra weight. I've had the best results just by fitness walking (twice a day is best, but no way am I trying to walk fast on ice--in winter, I do once a day walking DVD and call it good) and using the MyFitnessPal food and exercise tracker. Always supposing I'm not inclined to lie (and who the heck am I lying to but myself? lol), seeing the numbers keeps me honest. Having said that, I'm brooding over my stupid ankle right now; not being able to fitness walk since before Christmas=5 lb weight gain. Not happy about having to take that back off.
I know exactly what you mean. Not being able to use the treadmill has made a significant difference for me but that may be a good thing. I didn't think it was making any difference before but now that I have proof right there on the scales and in how my clothes fit, I am more motivated to get back to it as soon as I get the thumbs up. Even though I wasn't losing pounds, turns out it was keeping me from gaining since I wasn't paying attention to my portion sizes and I was toned. It's amazing what just walking can do for toning your abdominal muscles and keeping that muffin top away.