I saw both of my parents when they died. I really really regretted seeing my dad that way. He had always been the strong man, and his death was unexpected. To see a man bigger than life taken down haunted me forever. I was young too. So the thought of him not being there scared me that I couldn't do it without him.
My mom, that's a different story. She had been sick for 2 years. Lots of pain, anger, sadness, struggle, triumph and ultimately death. I got right up to her and we looked each other in the eyes and I told her I loved her and would miss her and she could go, I would be okay. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. Surreal. I had to be with her. I had to be there. I had to see my duty through to the end. And I did. I am proud I did. And I am a completely different person now. completely. This forever changed my DNA. And I'm a better person for it all.
