Funny things kids say and do.

[AnnaMarie]

Here's a place to share about you kids, grandkids, neighbours kids, any kids that make you laugh.

I have a very funny story to share about my teen. At his age, this is rare. I have to finish baby-proofing since my grandson is on his way here. I'll be back either tonight or tomorrow morning.

Please, share your stories.

 

[fushingfeef]

There's a little boy who lives a few doors down who has a huge crush on my daughter Jillian. She does not hate the kid, but she has absolutely no interest in him. She told me he's just kind of annoying because he's always trying to be near her. Poor little guy.

Yesterday he got off the school bus with her and as they were walking up the street, he kept bumping his hand against Jillian's hand, and then he'd say "Jillian keeps trying to hold my hand!"

 

[blunthead]

There's a little boy who lives a few doors down who has a huge crush on my daughter Jillian. She does not hate the kid, but she has absolutely no interest in him. She told me he's just kind of annoying because he's always trying to be near her. Poor little guy.

Yesterday he got off the school bus with her and as they were walking up the street, he kept bumping his hand against Jillian's hand, and then he'd say "Jillian keeps trying to hold my hand!"

She'd better get used to this kind of attention. The life of a movie star comes with unique challenges.

 

[AnnaMarie]

Last night while doing dishes together, my son and I were discussing "friends with benefits". He told me that before he knew what it meant he got his friend mad at him using that term. When he was in middle school, they went to the variety store and his friend bought him some candy. He said "I'm glad we're friends with benefits" and smiled.

 

[GNTLGNT]

...my youngest, when he was but a nipper-had a belly-ache, and told us his "intesticles" hurt...

 

[fushingfeef]

Last night Addie said her teacher did a "living joke" on the class for April Fool's Day. (She meant a practical joke.)

 

[fljoe0]

When I played softball, we often hung out in the parking lot after the games talking before we went home. One night, a bunch of us were standing around a friends truck and his little boy (about 6) jumped up in the drivers seat and started to pretend he was driving. He was moving the steering wheel back and forth when all of the sudden he stopped and hit the horn and yelled, "Bitch!"

I guess he had been paying attention to what his dad did when he drove.

 

[kingzeppelin]

My four year old grandson Elliot was taken to a museum by his Dad, and was mightily impressed by the dinosaur skeletons.
On the way home in the car he asked why, and how, the dinosaurs had become extinct.
His Dad explained that it is believed Climate Change caused an Ice Age, and they couldn't with stand the low temperatures and died out.

Elliot pondered on this for while, then said " I see... so when it got cold... they went into the museum to keep warm but died ..and that's why there bones are there!"

 

[Out of Order]

My four year old grandson Elliot was taken to a museum by his Dad, and was mightily impressed by the dinosaur skeletons.
On the way home in the car he asked why, and how, the dinosaurs had become extinct.
His Dad explained that it is believed Climate Change caused an Ice Age, and they couldn't with stand the low temperatures and died out.

Elliot pondered on this for while, then said " I see... so when it got cold... they went into the museum to keep warm but died ..and that's why there bones are there!"

This makes perfect sense to me. That boy is going places!!

 

[Walter Oobleck]

Man I worked for in Florida...Joey...two-year-old...said something to me this once. He'd be...older. Early 80s this was so what'd that make him? Crimminie...in his 30s? Anyway, cute little two-year-old, barefoot usually...I think he'd graduated from diapers only recently. I musta been outside waiting on my boss...Mr. Law. I was waiting rietch cheer...Joey is playing, looks up at me, and says, "You're a ro-ho." No idea...at the time...what he meant, but eventually it dawned on me. Then this other time...2nd-hand this information...Joey and his mom are in the Winn-Dixie or the Publix, grocery shopping...and there's a very small black man over across the way. Dunno what the PC-term for a midget is, but that's what he was, and he starts shouting, Mama! Look at the little man! The older man was a champ and took it all in stride.

 

[pegasus216]

Ok, Walter, what is a 'ro-ho'? I've hurt my head trying to figure it out.
My grand daughter is always doing something to crack me up. My grandson has one of those punching bags that sit on the floor, and when you punch it, it bounces back at you. Well, they like to lay it on the floor, and Kat gets to the biggest end of it, and one of us stomps the smaller end with our foot. She goes bouncing up on it, and giggles her head off. She thinks that is the funniest thing! Also, hitting her brother makes her giggle. She is so bad!

 

[MadamMack]

...my youngest, when he was but a nipper-had a belly-ache, and told us his "intesticles" hurt...

 

[cat in a bag]

Evan is entering his surly phase of life, at 12. Hubby was just talking to him, trying to talk some sense into him (which is pointless at this stage, I know. ) Anyway, Scott tells him, "If you play your cards right"... And Ty (7), thinking he's being left out of something, pipes up and says, "I want to play cards too!"

 

[Out of Order]

Evan is entering his surly phase of life, at 12. Hubby was just talking to him, trying to talk some sense into him (which is pointless at this stage, I know. ) Anyway, Scott tells him, "If you play your cards right"... And Ty (7), thinking he's being left out of something, pipes up and says, "I want to play cards too!"

 

[Walter Oobleck]

Ok, Walter, what is a 'ro-ho'? I've hurt my head trying to figure it out.
My grand daughter is always doing something to crack me up. My grandson has one of those punching bags that sit on the floor, and when you punch it, it bounces back at you. Well, they like to lay it on the floor, and Kat gets to the biggest end of it, and one of us stomps the smaller end with our foot. She goes bouncing up on it, and giggles her head off. She thinks that is the funniest thing! Also, hitting her brother makes her giggle. She is so bad!

A ro-ho is a homo...interpreted by a two-year-old. My post doesn't make much sense, hey? That happens. Sounds like my boss is two...but then, he acted like a two-year-old at times. Yeah, those were fun times. There's a story behind it all, and Joey only repeated what he'd heard, or like I said, what he understood he heard. Once upon a time and once in a time I've come across one or two who develop a love jones for me. Things happen. In this case it was a former Marine from Kentucky who'd followed me onto a job...he'd talked to the same job-rep at the Job Service as I had. So all this mysterious...stuff...happens and then lo and behold it begins to make sense. Life. Sheesh...sometimes...I like to run around, as the song has it, I like to dazzle everything you do! But I never seem to hear correctly, either.

 

[AnnaMarie]

An on-line friend's son goes to Catholic school. He is six years old. His homework was to re-tell the story of Easter. He says Jesus should have gone to the hospital, then he wouldn't have ended up in the graveyard where he turned into a zombie, which is what happens when you come back from the dead.

 

[DiO'Bolic]

When my youngest daughter was three, she and her older sister were roughhousing on the sofa. She accidentally kicked out one of her sister’s front teeth (luckily it was a baby tooth). My youngest came running to me with tears in her eyes asking if I could put it back in sissy’s mouth. I told her sorry, but that was unfortunately something not possible to do. It was a crushing moment of her childhood to discover that daddy couldn’t fix everything.

 

[AnnaMarie]

That reminds me of a family story from before I was born.

My sister was 5 and brother 4. They were sitting outside having a snack before bed when my sister looked up in the sky and said "awe, look! The moon is broken." My brother looked up and said "that's OK. Daddy fick it."

(That's not a typo. It's how he said it.)

 

[cat in a bag]

I've had a pretty good spring cold going on the last week. I spent a good majority of the weekend just resting. Evan was bringing me a glass of water, and asked me if I was ok. I said I just didn't feel good. He gets this horrified look on his face, and quietly asked, Do you think it's spring fever?

I burst out laughing, and then coughing. I never dreamed, that at age 12, he thought spring fever was an actual illness. I told him it was just an expression that people use when they're plumb sick of winter, while laughing, which of course had the effect of turning him very quickly from concerned to surly again.

 

[Neesy]

I've had a pretty good spring cold going on the last week. I spent a good majority of the weekend just resting. Evan was bringing me a glass of water, and asked me if I was ok. I said I just didn't feel good. He gets this horrified look on his face, and quietly asked, Do you think it's spring fever?

I burst out laughing, and then coughing. I never dreamed, that at age 12, he thought spring fever was an actual illness. I told him it was just an expression that people use when they're plumb sick of winter, while laughing, which of course had the effect of turning him very quickly from concerned to surly again.

That is awfully cute - what about "cabin fever"? - is this something you catch at the cabin!? Your son must be very cute cat in a bag! - I hope you feel better soon