Asking for some thoughts today. Or maybe just an ear for a few minutes.
We had to say goodbye to our fifteen year old Bichon/Shih Tzu 'HAWKEYE' yesterday after a few hard months of declining health. He was starting to lose muscle ability in his back legs and was struggling with multiple ailments in his later years, specifically Cushing's disease and liver issues.
My wife, who works in a vet clinic, kept him going comfortably via medication and related therapy until it was evident that he was suffering beyond available intervention. She had researched his conditions endlessly, for years, and I can say she gave it her all (and more) for him, though today she feels like she could have done more at the beginning and thinks that she gave up on him. She says she knows she did the right thing for him in putting him down, but like all pet-parents out there, the guilt is ever so present.
The kids are devastated, our other small dogs miss their buddy. We buried Hawkeye with his favorite stuffed toy in the yard between two cedars, where we can see from the kitchen window.
I'm in the supportive role, trying to keep everyone together, but I am strangely reliving the loss of my dad, who died of cancer ten months ago. Not a good day today, but not a bad day. Just a reflective one, I guess.
I'm rambling on... so I'll end here.