So many hugs to send around in this thread! (((((Love and Strength to All)))))
I have never been to jail myself, but I did bail a friend out once. (Long story, ended up getting thrown out, she's still one of my besties.)
Early one Monday morning, I received a collect call from my friend. I knew it was serious, because when you get a collect call from jail they tell you it's a collect call from jail. Being pretty dull housewife-type people, this was the first experience either of us had with this kind of situation.
The call went something like this, "This is a collect call from an inmate at Suchandsuch County Jail, will you accept the charges for this call from <click click> 'female voice trying to say her name was mostly just sobbing' <click click> Press one to accept the charges..."
I couldn't tell much from the message, but I had a pretty good idea of who it was and I accepted the call. (Honestly, I probably would have accepted it anyway, that's just way too mysterious to pass up!) Once she calmed down enough to where actual words were coming out, and not just wailing, we established where she was and that she needed me to come down right now and bail her out.
Again, we didn't know anything about any of this. We learned later that, given the situation, the judge would have seen her later that day and let her go without bail. Being ignorant, we thought for sure she'd be locked in the pokey for months while the wheels of justice ground slowly along. Seriously, we had no idea. And the people at the jail don't really have the time to do a full "newbie orientation" with hand outs and coffee cake.
So, being the resourceful person I am, I got out the Yellow Pages (it's been a while) and looked up "Bail Bondsman." Maybe nowadays there is somewhere on the internet where you can read reviews of these folks, but I didn't even know where to start.
I ended up choosing one because his ad made him seem kind of fun and sympathetic. No kidding, it said "If the Devil made you do it, I'll help you through it." Ha ha ha, bail humor! So funny. Yeah, anyway....
I have to give him credit because he tried to talk me out of putting up bail. Most of his argument revolved around the fact that this way crap money for him, but he did point out that based on the charges, my friend would most likely be out by noon no matter what I did.
I should have listened, but I thought of how scared I would be, and how I told her I was coming, and there was still a chance she wasn't going to get out in the next few hours, and what a turd I would feel like if I left her sitting there.
So, I gave the man $350 and signed over the title of my minivan, and ran off to the jail to break my friend out. Which was completely boring not at all like on TV, but awesome in its own way. They should play some inspiring instrumental music over the intercom in the room where you wait to pick someone up, so it will feel more like a movie rescue.... Just a thought. I guess if you have to pick people up routinely, that would get old, though.
Anyway, that's where my personal problems with this whole situation started. Up until now I was involved as the caring friend on the sharp end of justice gone wrong. After the bail paperwork, even though she paid me back the cash right away, my family vehicle was tied up in this mess.
My friend was an angel through the whole process. She showed up whenever and wherever she had to until the charges were dropped and she was no longer "on bail." No complaints there. I've never needed to bail her out again, but I would because she's rock solid.
My personal nightmare started when I went with my paperwork that said "Congratulations Jen, your friend is free to go" to clear the title of my car.
Mind you, I had the car the whole time, but I didn't really "own" it outright while the bail was in effect. I couldn't sell it, or use it as collateral to bail out anyone else who needed my services.
So, I've got my minivan, but I need to clear the title. I have the paperwork from the courts that I need to show the bondsman. Easy peasy!
Except now I can't find the bondsman.
Oh sure, I can find his sympathetically funny ad, but when I call the number there is no answer. Ever. He is moved away, or dead, or out of business, whatever it is, he's not there any more to help me through what the Devil made me do.
Eventually we found the person who had taken over his accounts and finally got the title cleared. But it took over 18 months.
My friend and I laugh about it, how it took for-d@mn-ever to clear up the bail that saved her from 4 hours of jail. We both learned a lot about life, the courts, jail, and friendship. And to shop around before posting bail!