Deep breath, in and out......
Maybe try not to let someone who has very little space in your life.... put you through so much emotional anguish. You have so many other things to give your energy to, perhaps this person doesn't deserve so much of it?
I Am Angry Today Because . . .
- Thread starter MadamMack
- Start date
-
This message board permanently closed on June 30th, 2020 at 4PM EDT and is no longer accepting new members.
Maybe try not to let someone who has very little space in your life.... put you through so much emotional anguish. You have so many other things to give your energy to, perhaps this person doesn't deserve so much of it?
True, Flake, everything is getting to me too much and people don't know the half of it, as a lot happens when I am alone with no one watching, some minor thing goes awry and I curse it excessively. I went rather off the deep end when Ray Bradbury's house was torn down, and a lot of stuff is going on in my own life I fear will not end well. A lot comes down to the wrong things being valued and rewarded in this world. Anyhow, there is enough genuine negative stuff already without being blocked or whatever because someone is spreading falsehoods!
It's a really big thing to be able to recognise in ourselves when things are slipping... and it happens to us all at different times. Being able to choose the things that we want to spend a lot of time thinking about is hugely empowering... letting go of the stuff that can only harm us without any (or very little) benefit, is even more special.
Sending you a hug... ((( CoriSCapnSkip ))) please don't give up, there is still so much good in the world, sometimes it's just a little bit hidden.
I think I'm more hurt than angry. Yes, definitely hurt.
Yesterday, I learned than my good friend from high school got married.......TWO YEARS AGO.....and while we've talked or texted almost weekly for the last five years, he never mentioned this to me. Never found an opportunity in two years time to say, btw I got married. Nope, not a word about it. I also learned yesterday that he and his wife are expecting a baby this month......I suppose that since he never mentioned the wedding, he figured why mention expecting a baby......
This isn't just an old high school acquaintance, we were....and I thought.....still are very close friends. Maybe I thought more of our friendship than he does..... All I know is that my feelings are hurt.....deeply.
Yesterday, I learned than my good friend from high school got married.......TWO YEARS AGO.....and while we've talked or texted almost weekly for the last five years, he never mentioned this to me. Never found an opportunity in two years time to say, btw I got married. Nope, not a word about it. I also learned yesterday that he and his wife are expecting a baby this month......I suppose that since he never mentioned the wedding, he figured why mention expecting a baby......
This isn't just an old high school acquaintance, we were....and I thought.....still are very close friends. Maybe I thought more of our friendship than he does..... All I know is that my feelings are hurt.....deeply.
((Sunny)) Maybe he thought it would stop your weekly texts if he'd told you - some weird jealousy thing? I can understand the hurt feelings, but maybe his intentions were good??
I smell something fishy and it ain't a jello mold............
Did he finally tell you he was married with a baby on the way, or did someone else tell you?
See, I'm the type of person when things happen, I go straight to the source and ask. For some reason, this puts people off but to me, why sit there and create this whole thing in my head that might not be true? And when it is a case of a rumor (not in this case) I think the person has the right to know what rumors are going around and be able to address them if they choose.
I always find that I create much more drama in my own imagination than there needs to be. the actual reality of a situation is most times much simpler. I would ask and give him a chance to explain. And I would just come straight out and tell him you are hurt. Because, yes, this is very strange. Odd.
I'm this way exactly too. I can't stand to sit and let my mind go to different places when I don't know for sure what's true and what isn't. I always ask the person, and like you said, it often is off-putting, esp if it's not true. I just can't bear to not know exactly the truth, and I don't want to be placated with anything less.(((Sunny)))
No, he still hasn't told me. He acted a little funny last week when I asked him if he had gotten married yet.....we always ask each other that question......it's a long running joke with us. He didn't reply in the usual way. I had also mentioned to him that my BF and I might be in Los Angeles for New Year's Eve, and he said that he would probably be in the Philippines. I didn't think anything of that, his girlfriend is from there.....but when he started acting weird, I searched face book using his girlfriend's first name and his last name. They were married on May 4,.2013.....I saw the wedding photos...... Baby is due this month.
I asked him why he didn't tell me......I haven't received a reply.
Most people have the idea, "I'm not going to ask about that." I come off as nosy. When in fact, I am being respectful to them to let them know something is up, and here's your chance to either confront it and clear it up, or not. I give them a choice.
So agree. Like you, my imagination makes everything worse than it is if I don't directly ask the person. I may have just perceived a slight, when the person didn't really mean that at all, but often, if they don't understand why I perceived it that way, they get offended by the fact that I thought it at all. I struggle with this a lot, because I will sometimes not understand the actions of another...so I ask.
I'm so sorry you're hurting (((Sunny,))) the people we care about the most often end up hurting us the most... because we give them the biggest piece of real-estate in our hearts.
I am often stupid when it comes to friendships and seem to give out my whole heart without meaning to... but I am getting better at caring sensibly.
I hope he will reply to you and that you can talk it through, resolution is so important, even if the friendship alters.
I hope he replies, too.
At this point I'm not sure there even is a friendship......beginning to wonder if there ever really was.
This is bothering me a lot more than I expected it to......I didn't sleep well last night, and had myself a good cry this morning.....I almost feel like someone has died.
((((Sunny))))) Cant you call him and have it out with him?. Then it is harder to duck a question than in a mail. Also it might bring you some kind of closure, either good or bad but at least then its easier to move on. All the best.
Tried calling him yesterday. It rang over to voicemail, and the mailbox is full.
(((Sunny))) I'm sorry your friend hurt you. I don't understand why people seem to have to be hurtful to each other.