Miss The Boat??
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AhaaaaaaWasn't me.....this time.
I do know the area, though......members of my family live on Sampson Road.
Richard Pryor called it the fear of God.
I just spoke with my uncle,
However, we both have the same guess as to who it was.......
I spoke to my uncle.....it wasn't him, either.
However, we both have the same guess as to who it was.......
...where were Gilligan and the Skipper???....
They missed the boat waiting on Ginger and Mary Ann to get ready to be rescued.
...and the Professor was still friggin' around with the "rescue radio"...
...because he'd lost his mind years before...
I really want to share the entire story with y'all.....but I'm not sure it will come out as comical as I found it to be.
You really have to kinda know how some of the folks around here are. They're not criminals, just a couple of backwoods rednecks who woke up to find that a boat had been dumped on their property during the night.
My uncle got the story from one of the local good ol' boys, and when he told me the tale, I laughed until my sides hurt.
You really have to kinda know how some of the folks around here are. They're not criminals, just a couple of backwoods rednecks who woke up to find that a boat had been dumped on their property during the night.
My uncle got the story from one of the local good ol' boys, and when he told me the tale, I laughed until my sides hurt.
I'm trying, I'm trying..... It's not gonna be as funny, though....but I'll try.
So, I called my uncle and I asked him "How did Brains get the boat into the middle of the intersection, and why did he leave it there?"
My uncle says "What makes you think Brains did it?".....
Me: C'mon Duck, Really?....that has his name all over it. I know he had to have help, but that is a Brains special, right there.
Uncle, laughing: Yeah, I guess you're right about that.
Me: Did you help him?
Uncle: No, I was at the taxidermist's when that happened. Seen it when I came home. My first thought was whatthehell has Brains gotten into now..... Now, he never did admit full out that it was him, but he came down to the garage later that day, and he was covered with that red clay mud.....the kind that you find along the roadside here, you know how hard it is to get the stains out of something....it just can't be done. Anyhow, he's got that stuff all over his boots, his pants, his shirt....you can just picture it, I know....
So I says to him, Brains, did you see that dang boat sitting out in the road? And he says back to me, I did happen to notice it earlier.
Uncle: Wonder how it come to be there?....looks to me like somebody tried to take the thing down the road without a trailer and lost control a little bit, and the rope broke.....
Brains: Imagine that
My uncle says "What makes you think Brains did it?".....
Me: C'mon Duck, Really?....that has his name all over it. I know he had to have help, but that is a Brains special, right there.
Uncle, laughing: Yeah, I guess you're right about that.
Me: Did you help him?
Uncle: No, I was at the taxidermist's when that happened. Seen it when I came home. My first thought was whatthehell has Brains gotten into now..... Now, he never did admit full out that it was him, but he came down to the garage later that day, and he was covered with that red clay mud.....the kind that you find along the roadside here, you know how hard it is to get the stains out of something....it just can't be done. Anyhow, he's got that stuff all over his boots, his pants, his shirt....you can just picture it, I know....
So I says to him, Brains, did you see that dang boat sitting out in the road? And he says back to me, I did happen to notice it earlier.
Uncle: Wonder how it come to be there?....looks to me like somebody tried to take the thing down the road without a trailer and lost control a little bit, and the rope broke.....
Brains: Imagine that
Uncle: It looks a lot like the boat that was dumped by the road down near your place....
Brains: Imagine that....
Uncle: How would you reckon that happened?
Brains: I can't say for certain, but I can guess that someone was gonna take it in for scrap, but figured along the way that the thing is fiberglass, not metal.....there ain't no money in scrapped fiberglass, you know....
Uncle: true, true
Brains: Imagine that....
Uncle: How would you reckon that happened?
Brains: I can't say for certain, but I can guess that someone was gonna take it in for scrap, but figured along the way that the thing is fiberglass, not metal.....there ain't no money in scrapped fiberglass, you know....
Uncle: true, true
This is better than As The World Turns........
Brains: You know something?.....a boat is kinda hard to maneuver without a proper trailer.....
Uncle: I'll just bet it is......
Do you think that whoever was pulling the thing made all those donut track marks in the mud over there on the Parkway?
Brains: No doubt, they did.....If I was a betting man, I'd guess that they was trying to turn the blasted thing around to take it back, and that !@#$%^&* rope broke.....Probably was two guys.....the little one wasn't much help to help pull the blame thing out of the road, but they was trying real hard.
Uncle: You don't say.....
Uncle: I'll just bet it is......
Do you think that whoever was pulling the thing made all those donut track marks in the mud over there on the Parkway?
Brains: No doubt, they did.....If I was a betting man, I'd guess that they was trying to turn the blasted thing around to take it back, and that !@#$%^&* rope broke.....Probably was two guys.....the little one wasn't much help to help pull the blame thing out of the road, but they was trying real hard.
Uncle: You don't say.....
I'll have to finish this tale later this evening..... Gotta get ready for work.
You can't just leave us hanging..............I just made popcorn for the ending!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You just have to picture these two ne'er do well redneck guys.....if you've seen Tucker & Dale VS Evil, picture two guys about like that...
I know these people, so I found the story freaking hilarious....
Okay.....for you, I'll take my laptop to work with me today. I might have an open window that I can use to finish.....
since you already made popcorn and all