New things with you!

[Neesy]

We cried about the leftovers.

Why did you cry? Don't you guys in Sweden believe in "doggy bags"? That is my favorite [can take stuff home to reheat later!]

 

[Neesy]

1) Decided to ask my girlfriend and her son to move into my place with my son and I. She happily accepted so we started that process a couple of weekends ago.

2)During the process of moving her stuff I managed to fall down a somewhat steep flight of stairs end over end...There were 14 stairs. How do I know that you ask? Because I went back and counted them the next day and I could remember hitting every damn one of them with various body parts. Knocked me completely unconscious as I crashed thru the baby gate at the bottom head first. Final score? Concussion, sprained back in two places, both knees sprained, right shoulder severely sprained, elbow sprained, both wrists sprained and the doc picked glass out of my head and back because I landed on the box of perfumes and body lotions I was carrying down the stairs breaking open most of them and lodging shards of glass in my back and stupid head. Had to get the details from my son second hand because the second half of the fall is a complete blank spot in my memory. I've taken some tumbles but nothing close to that, without a doubt the worst I've ever jacked myself up at one time in my life. GNT, you'd have been proud sir. I was unconscious for about three minutes according to my girlfriend. She's an ex-paramedic which probably came in pretty handy. Huge goose egg behind my right ear which I'm assuming is what knocked me out. I was able to get up eventually and get into the passenger seat of my SUV so she could drive me to the ER, of which I don't remember much at all other than what I've been told. 6 hours later, they let me go home whacked on Percocet. Never, ever been this sore in my life. Is it possible to be sore for this long after an injury? I'm not allowed to walk down stairs any more according to my girlfriend due to not being able to navigate them successfully..lol
Side story to this fiasco. I was amazed at how much my girlfriend was concerned about me. I had forgotten how nice it feels to have someone care about your welfare and she never left my side. As I was lying on the gurney in the emergency room I looked at her several times sitting with her arm around my son comforting him while the doc was evaluating me. I yelled across the room at one point "I LOVE YOU!"......I later blamed it on the Percocet and Demerol but it got everyone laughing, including the doc.

3)Got my son enrolled in Fayetteville's Youth Police Academy. He's a rock star there because the instructors are all guys and girls I used to work with and they are making sure he is having a good time. Crime scene investigation techniques, accident re-construction, PT tests, all kinds of good stuff. He's come home with very good things to say about the program and all the officers involved. He's been telling me he keeps getting picked to assist with demonstrations....go figure...lol He seems to really like it.

4)Setting up a trampoline for my son's upcoming birthday and a new swing set for the rambunctious 2-year old who has now turned my house into his own personal racetrack and toy dump.

5)Had three flats on my truck in three weeks and my plasma TV finally went out....WTF, ok, enough universe, I get it, please find someone else to poop on..thank you.

6)They opened a new restaurant in my city which specializes in.....gourmet grill cheese sandwiches. We went there last weekend, and the place has very good food. All kinds of grill cheeses with turkey, ham, just about any kind of cheese you could want.

7)Starting to realize that my feelings for my girlfriend are quite serious. I very much like having her and her son at my place full time now. I had forgotten how nice it is to just sit in the back yard and watch a kid play and talk to one another. I'm quite sure I could get used to it on a permanent basis. Over the last few years, I think I've forgotten what normal was but this seems to be close. I very much like where things are headed with her.

Hope everyone had a good break.

Hope you are healing up okay

 

[ghost19]

Hope you are healing up okay

Thank you ma'am. Healing very slowly it seems like....The mystical regenerative powers of my 20's seems to no longer be present....

 

[Neesy]

Thank you ma'am. Healing very slowly it seems like....The mystical regenerative powers of my 20's seems to no longer be present....

You now have Tamara to kiss your "boo-boos" - so happy for everyone!

 

[Kurben]

Why did you cry? Don't you guys in Sweden believe in "doggy bags"? That is my favorite [can take stuff home to reheat later!]

We were so stuffed that we couldn't think! We forgot to ask for a doggybag. We just wanted to sink down in a corner somewhere and sleep. So on the way home we remembered and cursed ourselves for being stupid.

 

[Neesy]

We were so stuffed that we couldn't think! We forgot to ask for a doggybag. We just wanted to sink down in a corner somewhere and sleep. So on the way home we remembered and cursed ourselves for being stupid.

Okay - that makes sense - Andy seemed almost embarrassed to ask for one when he first came to Canada (I am not sure if it is not done in Scotland or if it was just his personal preference).

 

[Kurben]

Okay - that makes sense - Andy seemed almost embarrassed to ask for one when he first came to Canada (I am not sure if it is not done in Scotland or if it was just his personal preference).

I never usually think of it because i practically always finish whats is served (My Mother used to say that it didn't matter how much food she prepared for dinner. I would eat it all even if my insides should burst from all the food. My father, as usual, made a literary simile. He said that i did not have a mouth, instead i had a Ginungagap (a reference to Norse Mythology)).

 

[ghost19]

You now have Tamara to kiss your "boo-boos" - so happy for everyone!

And to make fun of me every time we approach a flight of stairs together. It's already started. We were headed into a restaurant this weekend that had some stairs you had to walk up. She grabbed me by the shoulders and guided me toward the wheelchair ramp with my son laughing and cheering her on....good to know he has my back.....

 

[do1you9love?]

And to make fun of me every time we approach a flight of stairs together. It's already started. We were headed into a restaurant this weekend that had some stairs you had to walk up. She grabbed me by the shoulders and guided me toward the wheelchair ramp with my son laughing and cheering her on....good to know he has my back.....

She sounds like she's perfect for you!

 

[ghost19]

She sounds like she's perfect for you!

Yeah, I tend to gravitate toward people who are as sarcastic as I am...and she most definitely is...lol

 

[GNTLGNT]

Guess this is as good a place as any to put this.

During the time the board was closed I came down with a severe respiratory infection which I’m still getting over. Spent over a week at home and I would jot down random thoughts every day when I going stir crazy. So here’s a collection of them. Just bear in mind: I was high on meds when I wrote this stuff. So uh… a lot of it is going to sound bitter and demented.

People seem to like attention when they’re sick. Those people are called idiots. I have near Batman-level of self-control when it comes to dealing with people during working hours, but after 5 pm I will snap out of that like nobody’s business. The last thing I want is a bunch of people asking me how I’m feeling. I don’t like the attention. I don’t like having to answer the same question repeatedly. I don’t like the constant offering of home-made remedies. Those things make zero sense. I don’t want to eat some weird root or drink tea made from some bush that a wild animal peed on.

Speaking of cure-alls, let’s talk about Vicks Vaporub. Where I live, old people seem to believe that this will cure anything. I couldn’t even walk out in my own front yard without somebody stopping to tell me “Hey I heard you’re sick. Did you use Vicks?” Got a chest cold? Rub some Vicks. Congested? Shove Vicks up your nose. Sore throat? Swallow that junk like you’re training for a career in porn when you realise just how worthless that state-sponsored academic certificate really is. Fell down and haemorrhaging out the side of your head? Slap some Vicks on that sucker and go drink a cup of tea made out of some plant your aunt grows in a drain outside her house. If honey was the nectar of the Greek gods, then Vicks Vaporub was sent to old people straight from the divine hands of one of our multi-limbed deities (I’m a Hindu, it’s okay if I make that wisecrack, you can laugh). If Vicks were any more advanced, it would grow limbs on a Sunday morning and wash your car. Don’t tell me nothing ‘bout Vicks. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Speaking of well-intentioned neighbours, I have quite a few truly good ones. They’re gold. The rest are a-holes. My neighbours barely see me and so, when my car is spotted in the garage, they take advantage. I can’t articulate how much I enjoy dragging my ass out of my sick-bed to answer someone calling only to have them ask “Hey I saw your car parked under the house. You home today, huh?” No @$$-hat, I’m really at work but practicing my astral projection skills in my ultimate quest to defeat Stephen Strange and become Earth’s new Sorcerer Supreme, at which point I will have all the right spells to deal with neighbours like you. No I don’t do computer repairs anymore. No that sore on your foot probably won’t come out with alcohol (but thanks for sharing). No I don’t care about your kid’s cell-phone problems. I know your kid. He’s in secondary school, his penmanship and spelling stinks, he doesn’t have the sense to dress himself properly, he looks like a used Q-tip with his skinny-jeans and faux-hawk, why the exact eff are you buying him an iPhone? If you love your child, beat him with a dictionary instead, in [insert name of preferred deity here]’s name, [spiritual salutation goes here]. And no, I am not giving you some “spare change.” I know you’re going for alcohol. Destroy your liver on your government pension.

Admittedly, some of my neighbour issues are self-inflicted. I barely have time for myself, so the last thing I want to hear when I get home after a two-hour slog in traffic is that my mother accepted an invitation on my behalf to attend some neighbour’s event over the weekend. The only thing that gets me more annoyed is finding a wedding invitation on my desk or some fool calling me up asking if I want to go see a cricket game with them (no thank you I’m fairly certain that I can slip into a coma on my own if I tried hard enough). I once refused to go a neighbour’s party because I didn’t feel like walking that far after I had showered for the evening (she lives obliquely opposite my house). And that’s one of the neighbours I actually like. Now, social media has made it worse. All week I’ve been getting friend requests on Facebook from neighbours and relatives, and I can just feel their eyes burning into my back when I go outside, marking time to see when I’ll accept. Joke’s on you guys: I accepted. Because Facebook now has something called a “Restricted” list. Friend-request away, beaches.

Doctor’s visits. The only thing I hate more than getting sick is going to the doctor. You have to sit in the waiting room with all these other sick people. There’s always some cute little kid with his nose running like Usain Bolt who wants to talk to me (I know you really want to put your diseased little muppet hands on my tablet PC you little sh*t you better think again I will frikkin Lysol you). Then there is the injection. I’m not scared of needles, mind you. I got my tattoo by a guy named Dracula. It took over three hours while I read Heavy Metal magazines, he smoked weed and was a snob about using electric needles. I didn’t feel a damn thing. You damn kids nowadays have it easy. What gets me about injections is that you have to take it in the butt. What’s up with that medical practitioners? Like, welcome to 2017. We screw with DNA and clone animals now, you guys can’t come up with some other way to introduce medication into our bloodstream? Go watch some Star Trek (the real one, not the boy-band version) for inspiration and proceed to get jiggy with it. Cause Science, b*tches.

Then there are the odd side-effects I get with medications. I normally use a few supplements and that’s it. I don’t like the idea of introducing more chemicals into my body. I don’t even like taking pills for headaches. I carry around a bottle of paracetamol with me at the office and the women use it more than me. I don’t mind, cause women got their issues and I figure the more drugs they ingest, the better off our planet. We’re secretly glad you call us dogs. Been on YouTube lately? Dogs effing rock! Everyone loves them. But medication weirds me out. I lose focus. I lose mild coherence when I’m writing or speaking. It may mess with motor-skills. I came back home after the doctor did his what-what-in-da-butt and coked me up good, and I fell down taking off my pants. I don’t know whether I should even write this down because I’ve been high AF all week. The absolute worst thing however, is drugs remove any kind of filter I ever had in thoughts & words. That line between right and wrong is gone, as you can probably tell from reading this. This better wear off before I get back to the office next week.

What’s the one good thing though? I have a new pet. Well, sort of. Well, maybe not. Kind of. The neighbour got a new cat and it comes into our garden sometimes. I don’t have any more dogs so I don’t mind seeing the cat. It’ll show up at random and doesn’t stay long, like a casual labourer you hire to do some work who shows up promptly at your house three weeks after the agreed-upon date. The cat’s cute. Don’t get me wrong, cats are a-holes. But this one’s cute. But since it’s not my full-time pet, I didn’t put much of an effort into giving it a name so I just called him the first thing that popped into my head. So that’s how I wound up with a pet named F*ckface the Cat.

...this is just begging to be published.....

 

[GNTLGNT]

Oh yeah, my daughter got her driving permit on Monday......

....Yay Sunray!!!!!!!......

 

[GNTLGNT]

1) Decided to ask my girlfriend and her son to move into my place with my son and I. She happily accepted so we started that process a couple of weekends ago.

2)During the process of moving her stuff I managed to fall down a somewhat steep flight of stairs end over end...There were 14 stairs. How do I know that you ask? Because I went back and counted them the next day and I could remember hitting every damn one of them with various body parts. Knocked me completely unconscious as I crashed thru the baby gate at the bottom head first. Final score? Concussion, sprained back in two places, both knees sprained, right shoulder severely sprained, elbow sprained, both wrists sprained and the doc picked glass out of my head and back because I landed on the box of perfumes and body lotions I was carrying down the stairs breaking open most of them and lodging shards of glass in my back and stupid head. Had to get the details from my son second hand because the second half of the fall is a complete blank spot in my memory. I've taken some tumbles but nothing close to that, without a doubt the worst I've ever jacked myself up at one time in my life. GNT, you'd have been proud sir. I was unconscious for about three minutes according to my girlfriend. She's an ex-paramedic which probably came in pretty handy. Huge goose egg behind my right ear which I'm assuming is what knocked me out. I was able to get up eventually and get into the passenger seat of my SUV so she could drive me to the ER, of which I don't remember much at all other than what I've been told. 6 hours later, they let me go home whacked on Percocet. Never, ever been this sore in my life. Is it possible to be sore for this long after an injury? I'm not allowed to walk down stairs any more according to my girlfriend due to not being able to navigate them successfully..lol
Side story to this fiasco. I was amazed at how much my girlfriend was concerned about me. I had forgotten how nice it feels to have someone care about your welfare and she never left my side. As I was lying on the gurney in the emergency room I looked at her several times sitting with her arm around my son comforting him while the doc was evaluating me. I yelled across the room at one point "I LOVE YOU!"......I later blamed it on the Percocet and Demerol but it got everyone laughing, including the doc.

3)Got my son enrolled in Fayetteville's Youth Police Academy. He's a rock star there because the instructors are all guys and girls I used to work with and they are making sure he is having a good time. Crime scene investigation techniques, accident re-construction, PT tests, all kinds of good stuff. He's come home with very good things to say about the program and all the officers involved. He's been telling me he keeps getting picked to assist with demonstrations....go figure...lol He seems to really like it.

4)Setting up a trampoline for my son's upcoming birthday and a new swing set for the rambunctious 2-year old who has now turned my house into his own personal racetrack and toy dump.

5)Had three flats on my truck in three weeks and my plasma TV finally went out....WTF, ok, enough universe, I get it, please find someone else to poop on..thank you.

6)They opened a new restaurant in my city which specializes in.....gourmet grill cheese sandwiches. We went there last weekend, and the place has very good food. All kinds of grill cheeses with turkey, ham, just about any kind of cheese you could want.

7)Starting to realize that my feelings for my girlfriend are quite serious. I very much like having her and her son at my place full time now. I had forgotten how nice it is to just sit in the back yard and watch a kid play and talk to one another. I'm quite sure I could get used to it on a permanent basis. Over the last few years, I think I've forgotten what normal was but this seems to be close. I very much like where things are headed with her.

Hope everyone had a good break.

....so it took a near death experience to know you're literally head over heels with this gal?.....damn son-you dense!...glad you didn't break yer melon, though nothin' woulda slopped out.....you sir are a very lucky fella in many regards-hug that girl for me and tell her the GNT sent it.....

 

[morgan]

Prayers for your continued healing ghost19 . And many congrats on all the good stuff!

 

[Spideyman]

And to make fun of me every time we approach a flight of stairs together. It's already started. We were headed into a restaurant this weekend that had some stairs you had to walk up. She grabbed me by the shoulders and guided me toward the wheelchair ramp with my son laughing and cheering her on....good to know he has my back.....

That's special. Your son and and girlfriend have a bond between them-- guiding you to prevent self injury. Truly, ghost19 I am so happy for you- for all of you. Lots of love and only green lights!!

 

[Connor B]

Well, I'm making progress with my writing, and I saw Spider-Man: Homecoming today.

 

[FlakeNoir]

Daniel is having a really good time at the academy. I've been getting texts from a few of the guys that are instructors. Most of them have been there quite a while like I was. One of the older Sergeants who is one of the instructors sent me a text the other day. "Your son is very smart, asks a bunch of questions, and seems to really enjoy the technical aspects of the training, so we've all come to the conclusion he's absolutely not yours and you should probably have a paternity test at some point so you can help this boy find his real dad."

Another one of the guys I used to work in CID with has now rotated back to patrol and is an instructor for the academy. He sent me a text "Your son is so polite and respectful toward all the officers. I keep expecting him to say something crude about my mother since that's pretty much all you ever did while we were in CID."

Yep.....those guys never change

Perfect...

 

[HollyGolightly]

ghost19 I'm laughing at you and thrilled for you! Did you ever think this time last year that you would be so happy right now? She sounds wonderful and perfect. Watch yer 6.

Neesy I don't know about that girl. Watch out for her.

 

[ghost19]

....so it took a near death experience to know you're literally head over heels with this gal?.....damn son-you dense!...glad you didn't break yer melon, though nothin' woulda slopped out.....you sir are a very lucky fella in many regards-hug that girl for me and tell her the GNT sent it.....

LOL, I'd already told her I loved her several times prior to the stairs incident, but for some reason I felt it necessary to scream it across the room while under observation...lol. Like I said, it was the Demerol...lol. Thanks GNT, I've told her several times how the wonderful members of the SKMB have been my haven for a long time now. And yes, had I cracked my head open, the sound of escaping air would have been epic. Just stuff some straw back in there and I'd be right as rain...lol

 

[ghost19]

ghost19 I'm laughing at you and thrilled for you! Did you ever think this time last year that you would be so happy right now? She sounds wonderful and perfect. Watch yer 6.
This time last year I was just putting one foot in front of the other. If I've had a worse year than 2016, I can't think of it. This new relationship completely blind sided me but in a good way....

Neesy I don't know about that girl. Watch out for her.