Agreed, you are a bastard

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mjs9153

Peripherally known member..
Nov 21, 2014
3,494
22,165
Can you imagine having a farrier try to shoe the GNT? Don't think they make size 16EEE horseshoes..
Worked on a farm as a kid,and we had no horses,all cows,and some bulls..summers,we would take select cows to the county fair for show purposes,and that entailed cleaning them and shaving them,including the head.We had one particularly stubborn cow,that kept tossing her head..and cows have strong necks..I made eye contact with her,and began whispering,no real words,just monotone nonsense..shortly,she was like a statue,totally unmoving..I told my boss out of the side of my mouth,quick now! and he was able to shear her head with no problem,no moving from the animal..I guess I am the first cow whisperer,rather than a horse whisperer,LOL...but it sure worked.. ;)
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
59
Cambridge, Ohio
Can you imagine having a farrier try to shoe the GNT? Don't think they make size 16EEE horseshoes..
Worked on a farm as a kid,and we had no horses,all cows,and some bulls..summers,we would take select cows to the county fair for show purposes,and that entailed cleaning them and shaving them,including the head.We had one particularly stubborn cow,that kept tossing her head..and cows have strong necks..I made eye contact with her,and began whispering,no real words,just monotone nonsense..shortly,she was like a statue,totally unmoving..I told my boss out of the side of my mouth,quick now! and he was able to shear her head with no problem,no moving from the animal..I guess I am the first cow whisperer,rather than a horse whisperer,LOL...but it sure worked.. ;)
...probably cuz you were talkin' bullsh*t....
 

Walter Oobleck

keeps coming back...or going, and going, and going
Mar 6, 2013
11,749
34,805
Can you imagine having a farrier try to shoe the GNT? Don't think they make size 16EEE horseshoes..
Worked on a farm as a kid,and we had no horses,all cows,and some bulls..summers,we would take select cows to the county fair for show purposes,and that entailed cleaning them and shaving them,including the head.We had one particularly stubborn cow,that kept tossing her head..and cows have strong necks..I made eye contact with her,and began whispering,no real words,just monotone nonsense..shortly,she was like a statue,totally unmoving..I told my boss out of the side of my mouth,quick now! and he was able to shear her head with no problem,no moving from the animal..I guess I am the first cow whisperer,rather than a horse whisperer,LOL...but it sure worked.. ;)

cows despise adverbs...know this from a liberal friend of mine, born and raised milking cows...so my guess is the cow was listening hard for adverb usage and my second guess is that you didn't use any. good job. it'd have been the end-of-the-world as we know it if you used any adverbs. chicago fire? bad adverb usage. i read a report on-line. i'll try to find a link.
 

mjs9153

Peripherally known member..
Nov 21, 2014
3,494
22,165
cows despise adverbs...know this from a liberal friend of mine, born and raised milking cows...so my guess is the cow was listening hard for adverb usage and my second guess is that you didn't use any. good job. it'd have been the end-of-the-world as we know it if you used any adverbs. chicago fire? bad adverb usage. i read a report on-line. i'll try to find a link.
ummm..I have no idea what you are getting at here Walter,but,go with it.. ;)
I do know that the cows seemed to like country music in the mornings,as the boss put on a local radio station and none of the cows ever voiced displeasure..I wonder what the milk output would have been if we used a hard rock metal station,or classical music..
 
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Coyo-T

Well-Known Member
Oct 3, 2016
67
321
I'm not a fan of ponies, but I never saw myself riding a draft either. He's better tempered than a pony and you'd be amazed at the number of kids I can load up. Besides, he jumps like a jackrabbit. Aside from keeping him clean and my truly astonishing farrier bill, he's kind of perfect. Especially when you consider that I paid 36 cents a pound for him at auction.

What breed/cross is he? I actually like the idea of drafts as riding horses, though I generally love the wild types like mustangs and Chincoteague ponies (who normally fall into the "pony" size category but are more horse-like than normal pony breeds.)
 

Nomik

Carry on
Jun 19, 2016
3,973
22,555
44
Derry, NH
I have been to both Assateteague and Chincoteague islands, and let me tell you something: contrary to popular belief - them ponies ain't wild at all! They may have been wild at one point, but now, they block the road and walk boldly up to your car, sticking their head inside for your food. It's like a horse mugging!
In all seriousness, I've owned my fair share of horses (good lord that sounds pretentious); dressage, Eventing, Pony Club (a much bigger deal than it sounds like, ask the Brits), were kinda paramount to my adolescent development. I had a great instructor, Karen from the Mizpah Farm. She'd get up at the crack of dawn: snow, sleet, or black of (early daylight), and urge me to hurry up and curry down that beast! She was growing old and grey waiting on me. (My toes were frozen and my spurs weren't even on yet - my breeches were too tight, I couldn't find my crop . .) Words of wisdom from my riding instructor (I can still hear her New England loud nag:
"what, do you think, you're going to get rich looking at the ground or something? Is there money down there? LOOK AHEAD!"
"HEELS DOWN, eyes ahead, SHOULDERS BACK, DEEPEN THAT SEAT. HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YA?"
"Use the crop so he feels it this time"
She made me shed blood, sweat and tears before issuing any kind of compliment. It worked.
I was good. Never the best, but damned good.
 

Coyo-T

Well-Known Member
Oct 3, 2016
67
321
I have been to both Assateteague and Chincoteague islands, and let me tell you something: contrary to popular belief - them ponies ain't wild at all! They may have been wild at one point, but now, they block the road and walk boldly up to your car, sticking their head inside for your food. It's like a horse mugging!
In all seriousness, I've owned my fair share of horses (good lord that sounds pretentious); dressage, Eventing, Pony Club (a much bigger deal than it sounds like, ask the Brits), were kinda paramount to my adolescent development. I had a great instructor, Karen from the Mizpah Farm. She'd get up at the crack of dawn: snow, sleet, or black of (early daylight), and urge me to hurry up and curry down that beast! She was growing old and grey waiting on me. (My toes were frozen and my spurs weren't even on yet - my breeches were too tight, I couldn't find my crop . .) Words of wisdom from my riding instructor (I can still hear her New England loud nag:
"what, do you think, you're going to get rich looking at the ground or something? Is there money down there? LOOK AHEAD!"
"HEELS DOWN, eyes ahead, SHOULDERS BACK, DEEPEN THAT SEAT. HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YA?"
"Use the crop so he feels it this time"
She made me shed blood, sweat and tears before issuing any kind of compliment. It worked.
I was good. Never the best, but damned good.

I went to Chincoteague as a young kid long, long ago (back when Stormy was still alive) to see the swim- I don't remember the actual swim, though (I was probably too short to see!) but I remember the horses corralled for the auction and my dad losing part of the cam 'corder. ;;D

Riding is one of those skills I always felt I should have learned, but never did because the family was always moving and then just didn't have the money to devote to it. I was about to look into finally taking lessons from a woman recommended by a co-worker when I suddenly got laid off and ended up going back to college instead.
 

not_nadine

Comfortably Roont
Nov 19, 2011
29,655
139,785
Behind you
Last horse I rode was named Timmy. TiMmmEeeee.!! Said this story before.
Horse (and probably everyone else) got annoyed with me saying it. What can you do?
That was in the Poconos.

I used to ride as a child, just for events or birthday parties. Horses did not like it. They knew that we did not know what we were doing. How's that for a sentence?

They would head on purpose for low hanging branches, I am sure of it. Once, one got up on hind legs with me hanging on, a deer walked out on the trail. Took off, full speed back to the barns, ran through the pasture where all the others were. They started running alongside. Must have been 20 of them and me, close enough to feel the others with my legs - giving up on the reins and hanging on to that knob on the saddle for dear life. whee.
 

kingricefan

All-being, keeper of Space, Time & Dimension.
Jul 11, 2006
30,011
127,446
Spokane, WA
Last horse I rode was named Timmy. TiMmmEeeee.!! Said this story before.
Horse (and probably everyone else) got annoyed with me saying it. What can you do?
That was in the Poconos.

I used to ride as a child, just for events or birthday parties. Horses did not like it. They knew that we did not know what we were doing. How's that for a sentence?

They would head on purpose for low hanging branches, I am sure of it. Once, one got up on hind legs with me hanging on, a deer walked out on the trail. Took off, full speed back to the barns, ran through the pasture where all the others were. They started running alongside. Must have been 20 of them and me, close enough to feel the others with my legs - giving up on the reins and hanging on to that knob on the saddle for dear life. whee.

Sounds like my last date.......what? ;;D
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
87,651
358,754
59
Cambridge, Ohio
I agree. Even in jest, it seems disrespectful to our host and the members here as well.