Holiday Blues

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ghost19

"Have I run too far to get home?"
Sep 25, 2011
8,777
55,297
47
Arkansas
Nah, I didn't take it that way, ghost. And 'this true...being sober really sucks. I'm not even that huge of a partier these days - but I do like to have the option.

One of my friends, whom I've taken to calling my Voice o' Reason (he finds that funny), told me that I should consider trying out the whole sobriety thing for a while, stop self-medicating, and see what it might teach me. So far, I've learned that I don't like it. It leaves me feeling like I want to go to the other extreme, curl up in a corner and shoot dope, which I haven't done in a long time. Doubtless that has less to do with sobriety and more to do with my current state of mind, but I can't but think that smoking a big fattie would cause me to reassess that.
I'm feeling dumb ma'am because I'm not even sure what you do that takes you out to sea. I guess I must have missed it or something. I'm not real bright most of the time. Are you in the Merchant Marines or something?
 
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if-so-Grrl

Well-Known Member
Nov 25, 2010
2,907
1,216
The Last Frontier
I'm feeling dumb ma'am because I'm not even sure what you do that takes you out to sea. I guess I must have missed it or something. I'm not real bright most of the time. Are you in the Merchant Marines or something?
I'm a fisheries biologist. I work as an observer on fishing boats in Alaska, living and working on the boats, spending anywhere from a week or so to a few months in any given assignment.

Right now said assignment is a 135-foot crabber fishing opilio (snow) crab in the Bering Sea. I like the boat and crew, but it belongs to a big company that has some funny rules. For example, crew aren't allowed to drink, even in port. And they randomly drug test, so even the big Samoan from Hawaii ain't got no weed, much to his dismay. And mine.

The last boat I was on, in contrast, was populated by a bunch of druggies. This is also a problem, but ATM it would be preferable.
 

GNTLGNT

The idiot is IN
Jun 15, 2007
86,339
349,362
58
Cambridge, Ohio
Srbo, my brother,

Our circumstances are radically different, and yet so much of the feeling is the same. I don't really have a home anymore, either. When people ask where I'm from, I don't know how to answer. Usually I tell them I'm a gypsy.

My dreams, too, are dust, broken not by war but by a long battle with my personal darkness. The wreckage left by that fight is less visible, but painful nonetheless.

My husband...we don't speak much either these days, but because there is a chasm there, an abyss that I do not know how to cross. We no longer speak the same language.

My mom remains a dear friend and confidant, and I speak with her regularly, but hardly ever get to see her; she is thousands of miles away. She might as well be in a foreign country.

So, yeah, I get it...and I keep getrying a song stuck in my head, Eric Clapton singing "Can't Find My Way Home."

Merry Christmas, my friend. hug your wife and child. Hold them close.
...both of you, my first and most loved brother and my Tet-sister speak most wisely, eloquently and without feeling sorry for yourselves...these are harsh assessments and harder truths to swallow...I will in no way diminish the raw emotion contained therein-you both are very dear to me, and I just offer whatever solace I can provide when the mind's eye grows dark...
 

ghost19

"Have I run too far to get home?"
Sep 25, 2011
8,777
55,297
47
Arkansas
I'm a fisheries biologist. I work as an observer on fishing boats in Alaska, living and working on the boats, spending anywhere from a week or so to a few months in any given assignment.

Right now said assignment is a 135-foot crabber fishing opilio (snow) crab in the Bering Sea. I like the boat and crew, but it belongs to a big company that has some funny rules. For example, crew aren't allowed to drink, even in port. And they randomly drug test, so even the big Samoan from Hawaii ain't got no weed, much to his dismay. And mine.

The last boat I was on, in contrast, was populated by a bunch of druggies. This is also a problem, but ATM it would be preferable.
Wow. Present conditions excluded, that sounds interesting. So you work in the Bering Sea? Damn. Do you'll usually work a long ways out to sea? Are the hours long? Sorry for all the questions, I just think that sounds like a fascinating job. Have a good Christmas if possible. Do you'll get to come in for the holiday?
 

HollyGolightly

Well-Known Member
Sep 6, 2013
9,599
73,694
50
Heart of the South
Oh, I hear you, loud and clear.
I just wrote this, several minutes ago, and this thread seems fitting...if you don`t mind.

"It was one of those nights when you turn off the lights,
And everythin' comes into view..."
in the words of the immortal Bon Scott.

It is one of those nights, even though the day was not much better.
It was one of those days when my wife and I didn`t talk much, both of us somehow lost in our own thoughts. Yet we both knew what the other was thinking.
Holidays are probably the hardest thing there is since I left my old country and came to Canada. Somehow everything else seems easier than these days.
And it`s not even our holidays, the Serbian-Orthodox ones. Which don`t really matter.
People, or most of them, are gathering now together with their families, well wishes are being exchanged, gifts, family luncheons and dinners, hugs, laughter.
Grandparents reading stories to their grandchildren, and there is that special something in the air.
It doesn`t matter if it`s gonna be all gone the next day, the now is what matters.
We, who lost our country, land and a good part of our families don`t have that.
Our dreams are gone, all we can do is look ahead and build a future for our children, if we are lucky and blessed to have them.
I wonder what my mother is doing now...my sisters and their children. I even wonder if anybody is going to visit all those graves that are left behind us and light a candle.
Yeah, we needn't talk much these days, my wife and I, `cause we know where our thoughts and hearts are.
Home.
A home that isn`t our home anymore.
Merry Christmas, my friends, have a blast, love and laugh lots with your families and remember how blessed you are because you can do that.

That was lovely Srbo!
 

if-so-Grrl

Well-Known Member
Nov 25, 2010
2,907
1,216
The Last Frontier
Wow. Present conditions excluded, that sounds interesting. So you work in the Bering Sea? Damn. Do you'll usually work a long ways out to sea? Are the hours long? Sorry for all the questions, I just think that sounds like a fascinating job. Have a good Christmas if possible. Do you'll get to come in for the holiday?
We're currently about 100 miles out from St. Paul Island, which is a little rock in the middle of nowhere, about 230 miles north from Dutch Harbor. So yeah, we are WAY out to sea. It takes around 12 hours to get in to port, so we're not going in. Considering the weather, this is ridiculous. Most skippers would at least be anchored up someplace more sheltered, if not sitting at dock. Not this guy. And while this is a relatively big, stable boat, putting crew in harm's way in these conditions simply isn't necessary these days.

My actual working hours aren't bad - usually only 5-6 hours a day. In this fishery, I take one long sample where I have to measure everything in one pot; depending on how many crab there are, it can take me up to 3 hours to do. Which wouldn't be bad at all, if I wasn't sitting out there in the freezing cold, with a metal caliper in my hand, not moving. I'm well-dressed for it, but it is still one long, cold chunk of misery. No matter what I do, my feet are always numb by the time I'm 1/2 way through. Then I have 3 short samples, just ID and counting, each of which takes 30 minutes at most, sometimes a lot less. It just depends what shows up in my randomly chosen pots. Paperwork usually takes me at least a couple of hours, and is the one part of my job that I really hate.

I'm presently behind on that, so while I'm stuck indoors today, I'll be catching up and checking over my data. No fun, but at least it'll keep me occupied.

What I love most about the job is being at sea and seeing some really amazing things. I got to spend a couple of days hanging oit at a fur seal rookery on St. Paul watching the babies nurse and play and fight this fall - that was incredible. And I was getting paid to be there, which was better. Fishing in the ice last winter was also pretty incredible. And if all goes well, my next boat will be traveling way down the Aleutian chain, where there are a lot of birds and new (to me) species of critters to look at.

Merry Christmas to you! I'm holding off celebrating until I'm back in ccivilization, with friends and family, and have a drink in m
 

staropeace

Richard Bachman's love child
Nov 28, 2006
15,197
48,740
Alberta,Canada
Merry Christmas, my dear. I had sorta of a bad/good one. I went up North on Christmas eve with family. Five hour drive and some scary moments with the road in that part becoming snowy and icy. I walked on an area rug and drove a toothpick into my foot...almost the whole length of it. Early the next morning, I had to go see a doc because it was swollen and I could not bear weight on it. I had to get a tetanes shot. The family members helped me with the lifting when I cooked the roast turkey. I am back in Edmonton with one of the worse chest colds I have ever had. Tylenol 3 and some sleeping meds are coming in handly lol.
 

Neesy

#1 fan (Annie Wilkes cousin) 1st cousin Mom's side
May 24, 2012
60,213
232,491
Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
Merry Christmas, my dear. I had sorta of a bad/good one. I went up North on Christmas eve with family. Five hour drive and some scary moments with the road in that part becoming snowy and icy. I walked on an area rug and drove a toothpick into my foot...almost the whole length of it. Early the next morning, I had to go see a doc because it was swollen and I could not bear weight on it. I had to get a tetanes shot. The family members helped me with the lifting when I cooked the roast turkey. I am back in Edmonton with one of the worse chest colds I have ever had. Tylenol 3 and some sleeping meds are coming in handly lol.
Wow poor Staro - hope the meds help you to sleep - that sounded painful! Take care of yourself (I would call you "Me ducky" but I am not sure what it means!) Take care anyway and get lots of rest. Hey I did try cooking my turkey upside down and it turned out moist!
 

ghost19

"Have I run too far to get home?"
Sep 25, 2011
8,777
55,297
47
Arkansas
Merry Christmas, my dear. I had sorta of a bad/good one. I went up North on Christmas eve with family. Five hour drive and some scary moments with the road in that part becoming snowy and icy. I walked on an area rug and drove a toothpick into my foot...almost the whole length of it. Early the next morning, I had to go see a doc because it was swollen and I could not bear weight on it. I had to get a tetanes shot. The family members helped me with the lifting when I cooked the roast turkey. I am back in Edmonton with one of the worse chest colds I have ever had. Tylenol 3 and some sleeping meds are coming in handly lol.
That sounds like a Griswold family Christmas..wow, hope you get to feeling better.
 

ghost19

"Have I run too far to get home?"
Sep 25, 2011
8,777
55,297
47
Arkansas
That was lovely Srbo!
Off topic but I was watching the Australian New Year's Celebration this morning on TV. They had a massive fireworks display and I noticed during the display they had "Thunderstruck" by AC/DC cranked up to near ear splitting levels. That band just never gets old, they are masters at what they do..lol
 
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