Mine would be a traditional Greek Villa with a swimming pool and an ocean view...something I'll be searching for this summer since it's time to finally put down roots somewhere. Figured it may as well be the place I am happiest. 
Your DREAM Home Has...
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You just built it, and I have always said if there is sucha thang as reincarnation I hope to come back as a porch pooch, need a swell porch for that...oh but how I would love a top of the line snappy snazzy water closet, hey with one o' them bidets, reckon even as a thirsty ol' porch pupperoni I would most certainly appreciate one
A little ways back I had a muley pie, her name was Muley Pie, what would stand outside my window, talk to me some, griped alot, but I think mostly she just liked to watch old Rocky & Bullwinkle with me, oh and Popeye, lawd a'mighty she did loooves her some PopeyeA horse outside it.
A place like this wouldn't be half bad. As long as there's a creek or a lake nearby with good fishing, and I'd definitely need a good woods-wise horse for those hunting and gathering trips. Maybe in my next life?
No, I mean a home with a refrigerator because I don't have a refrigerator.
Oh, ok. Do you have an ice chest to keep your drinks cold?
I don't drink at home because that's how you become an alcoholic. I don't have a refrigerator partly because of that: it would be a temptation which I couldn't suppress, also I was finding that I was throwing out heaps of food because I was leaving in the fridge. Because I'm single I don't need a fridge. I use powdered milk for tea or coffee. I save approximately $670 annually on electricity bills.
That's the second time you said that. Get a Jacuzzi instead.
There is not such thing as low maintenance floors. I have beautiful hard wood floors that seem to collect and show all kinds of debris. Constantly having to sweep them for up keep. Sorry Spidey.
Sweeping and mopping are much "quieter" than running a vacuum, especially where critters are involved.
....self-cleaning rooms, along with books and action figures that aren't dust magnets.....