Really Bad Jokes.

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Sigmund

Waiting in Uber.
Jan 3, 2010
13,979
44,046
In your mirror.
:rofl:

Thank you all.

The dyslexic devil worshiper sold his soul to
Santa.

A blind man walks into a bar.
And a table. And a chair.


enhanced-buzz-2200-1402999367-4.jpg


:)

Peace.
 

hossenpepper

Don't worry. I have a permit!!!
Feb 5, 2010
12,897
32,897
Wonderland Avenue
Ghandi walked barefoot his whole life which callused his feet quite well. He also ate little which made him very frail and this odd diet purportedly caused a terrible case of bad breath. You know what all that made him?

A super calloused, fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis :face:
 
Last edited:

Moderator

Ms. Mod
Administrator
Jul 10, 2006
52,243
157,324
Maine
I know there is a joke thread already, but this is for really terrible, corny and otherwise crappy jokes. Spoiler the punchline, please!

I'll get us started...

Ghandi walked barefoot his whole life which callused his feet quite well. He also ate little which made him very frail and this odd diet purportedly caused a terrible case of bad breath. You know what all that made him?

A super calloused, fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis :face:
Seems like there was another thread started for bad jokes--if I can find it will combine the two.

Found it so have combined as promised.
 

SharonC

Eternal Members
Jul 9, 2007
2,958
11,254
Canada
The Will
Doug Smith is on his deathbed and knows the end is near. His nurse, his wife, his daughter and 2 sons, are with him. He asks for 2 witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to record his last wishes, and when all is ready he begins to speak:
My son, "Bernie, I want you to take the Mayfair houses.""
My daughter "Sibil, you take the apartments over in the east end.""
My son, "Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in the City Centre."
"Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on the banks of the river."
The nurse and witnesses are blown away as they did not realize his extensive holdings,
and as Doug slips away, the nurse says,
"Mrs. Smith, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property".
Sarah replies, "Property ? .... the twerp had a paper route!"
 

Anni M

Beta-Tester */ Moderator
Moderator
Apr 12, 2006
4,790
1,704
A Canuck Guelphling
Here are a few groaners for the cause. So dumb they're funny...

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Why don’t you ever see hippopotamus hiding in trees?
Because they’re really good at it

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What do you call a big pile of kittens?
A meowntain.

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.
Then it hit me.

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:biggrin-new:
 

Anni M

Beta-Tester */ Moderator
Moderator
Apr 12, 2006
4,790
1,704
A Canuck Guelphling
There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down her sneered at me and I thought, well that’s a little condescending.
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I started a band called 999 Megabytes — we haven’t gotten a gig yet.
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What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.
 

mal

content
Jun 23, 2007
4,714
27,243
59
Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
A string walks into a bar but the bouncer said "We don't serve strings here!"
He slinks away around the corner and down an alley. He twists himself up and messes with each of his ends and goes back to the bar.
The bouncer says "Are you a string?"
The string says "No. I'm a frayed not."

(Again...this one is better in the telling than in the writing).