Book Jealousy

[muskrat]

What I mean is: Does your significant other get peeved whenever they see you reading? This can go for friends and family too, I guess. Time spent reading is time not spent on THEM, and they get all huffy. I fly solo these days (with the Japanese THIS close to perfecting female androids, I figure I'll wait it out and see what happens) and one of the reasons, I suppose, is EVERY girlfriend I've ever had HATED it. Oh, they said they liked it at first--they saw all the books, they knew what I was--but, in time, it drove em nuts.

Wasn't like I was neglecting any duties to read or nothin, don't think it. I'd read while they watched tv or did whatever the hell it was they liked to do (can't remember, was too busy reading)...errr...anyhoo...

Now how about it? Does your reading 'bother' anyone? Husbands, wives, friends, family, pets, your boss, whatever?

 

[Dana Jean]

Yes. Everything I do bothers him but that's another story.

I very much like couples who can do their own thing. They don't have to be up each other's azzes 24/7. I have my hobbies. I have things I enjoy. I like alone time. I like to be in my house by myself.

 

[blunthead]

What I mean is: Does your significant other get peeved whenever they see you reading? This can go for friends and family too, I guess. Time spent reading is time not spent on THEM, and they get all huffy. I fly solo these days (with the Japanese THIS close to perfecting female androids, I figure I'll wait it out and see what happens) and one of the reasons, I suppose, is EVERY girlfriend I've ever had HATED it. Oh, they said they liked it at first--they saw all the books, they knew what I was--but, in time, it drove em nuts.

Wasn't like I was neglecting any duties to read or nothin, don't think it. I'd read while they watched tv or did whatever the hell it was they liked to do (can't remember, was too busy reading)...errr...anyhoo...

Now how about it? Does your reading 'bother' anyone? Husbands, wives, friends, family, pets, your boss, whatever?

When I was s student I found that life itself can be jealous. If I sat down to study I'd always have to fight off some kind(s) of distractions, whether from people, especially significant others, or animals or telephones or what/whomever. I understood that they were nothing more than tests of my resolve.

 

[Walter Oobleck]

Not that it has come to blows. he-he But I'll be reading in the kitchen...or in the living room, my wife will be hollering at the Tigers or doing e-Bay...and I'll shout out, Do I need to come in there! Or a variation, Don't make me come in there! Okay, I won't...or..yes...no, depending on how the mood strikes. What I usually get is, you're almost done with that! You just started that yesterday. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for my wife...she picked up three King novels for Christmas, aught-six this was...was already reading about Roland and his tower...she picked up Hearts, Bones, and Buick. And the rest is reform school...as the song has it...never made it to the charts, but hey, I was trying and that's all that matters. Onward, ever onward.

 

[Sigmund]

Hey Muskie.

No. Both my husband and my son read a ton. (Sunday mornings/afternoons were spent haunting the used book stores all over town. Each of us would get a stack of books and have a hey day all week reading.)


I do have some family and friends who marvel at the amount time I spend reading. You know how we always have a book with us to read? (On line, doc office, lunch, pharmacy etc.,) A co-worker one asked to see the book I was reading.He flipped through the pages and asked me how I could read books without *pictures*

(Have you been writing muskrat ?)

 

[skimom2]

Sometimes. I mean, I've never hid that I'm a big reader and I don't like to be bothered when I'm reading. My chatty daughter is MUCH worse than my husband about not respecting that time. Like you, I'm pretty good about time and place and not neglecting my family or what needs to be done. They're actually all much worse about interrupting writing time than reading time, which is why I'll breathe a sigh of relief when Little Mister Play-With-Me and Chatty Cathy are back in school--lol.

 

[Pucker]

I was fortunate in that my wife (may she rest) was an avid reader and loved Stephen King. In point of fact, she was one of these people who need a great deal of attention, but I accepted this as a natural progression from her (our) inability to have children and -- well -- because I accepted all her quirks, and she mine.

That's what you do, if you want it to work.

Some of my fondest memories are of looking up from whatever I was perusing and seeing her across the room in her favorite comfy chair -- the one that would both rock and spin around in a circle -- not paying any attention to me at all, engrossed in her own little world of imagination. That kind of comfort is a blessing, it seems to me: the ability to be together without being what dana describes as "being up each other's azzes."

It's a good thing, too, because I like an awful lot of stories more than I like a certain percentage of the people I have to deal with whether I want to or not.

But I suppose that's my problem and not theirs.

 

[Dana Jean]

I was fortunate in that my wife (may she rest) was an avid reader and loved Stephen King. In point of fact, she was one of these people who need a great deal of attention, but I accepted this as a natural progression from her (our) inability to have children and -- well -- because I accepted all her quirks, and she mine.

That's what you do, if you want it to work.

Some of my fondest memories are of looking up from whatever I was perusing and seeing her across the room in her favorite comfy chair -- the one that would both rock and spin around in a circle -- not paying any attention to me at all, engrossed in her own little world of imagination. That kind of comfort is a blessing, it seems to me: the ability to be together without being what dana describes as "being up each other's azzes."

It's a good thing, too, because I like an awful lot of stories more than I like a certain percentage of the people I have to deal with whether I want to or not.

But I suppose that's my problem and not theirs.

No, you can be in the same room, together and loving the companionship, but doing your own thing. Some couples, they just... I don't know how to epxlain it.

 

[GNTLGNT]

...oh hells yeah, I've gotten myself in deep dookie more than once cuz of my "paper ladies" if you will....Tracy knows I'm a voracious reader, but it has caused hard feelings on occasion, when the storyline has captivated me more than her at that moment...I suck at apologizing though about something that has been a lifelong habit...

 

[skimom2]

No, you can be in the same room, together and loving the companionship, but doing your own thing. Some couples, they just... I don't know how to epxlain it.

Mark and I can do that most of the time. He'll be on his tablet and I'll have a book, or both of us online, and it's not ignoring one another--it's companionable silence We often share things we're seeing online and have really good discussions about them, too. One place we can't agree is TV--he loves it and I'm not a fan. When we do sit down together, I have to be watching, not reading/online. THAT feels to him like I'm like ignoring him or patronizing him. I don't get that, but I respect how he feels and do my best to enjoy whatever is onscreen. To be fair, he doesn't expect me to sit through Seinfeld or Dragnet or MASH or Kill Bill or anything else he knows I really dislike. Making over 25 years together takes a bit of skillful negotiation and consideration!

 

[staropeace]

It has caused me some problems. My parents worried about me reading all the scary stuff all the time....till Dad started reading all the scary stuff too. I converted him to being a King fan.
My x used to get upset that I spent my spare time reading and not watching tv with him. I cannot do tv. It just does not hold my attention.
My cats love my reading. They like to sleep on my books or scratch their necks on the books in my hand.

 

[EMARX]

I spend most of my free time reading and yet my wife reads more than double the books I do in a year. There have been times in the past when my time spent online with others was a cause of a lot of difficulty, but I've gotten over that thankfully.

 

[Kurben]

My wife had no problem with my reading but she had a small problem with the amount of books in my bedroom. She said it felt like sleeping in a library which for some reason was uncomfortable. But we reached a compromise about that. Otherwise she had no problem with my reading. She read too but not as much. So she could be watching the tv while i was reading or be online somewhere. Worked well. We shared which was the important thing.

 

[blunthead]

...My cats love my reading. They like to sleep on my books or scratch their necks on the books in my hand.

No.

 

[staropeace]

No.

Yes

 

[blunthead]

Yes

Cats would never do that.

 

[danie]

Yes. Everything I do bothers him but that's another story.

This made me laugh oh so very hard.

 

[danie]

Some of my fondest memories are of looking up from whatever I was perusing and seeing her across the room in her favorite comfy chair -- the one that would both rock and spin around in a circle -- not paying any attention to me at all, engrossed in her own little world of imagination.

So sweet.

 

[CoriSCapnSkip]

Look Homeward, Angel, by Thomas Wolfe, includes an absolutely dreadful example of this. I am happy to say I have never experienced it. My family was so happy to see me being quiet and keeping out of trouble, they generally left me alone.

 

[Moderator]

Nope, but my partner reads more than I do (he's retired) and I don't have any problem with his reading habits either. We have the type of relationship that recognizes we are individuals and have hobbies and interests that don't require being in each other's space so that helps, too.