...bless you old buddy...if you need anything-I'm here...Thank you!!
I am so very sad and hurting...
- Thread starter staropeace
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....miss you honey-especially so at Kon time...
Thanks so much, Scott! I appreciate that alot. Now, get yo butt back to your Con festivities and don't worry about us folken! Wish I was there with y'all!!! (Tracy is one lucky woman)
Before I begin I'd like to say a genuine thank you for your concern. It's actually the first time anyone who doesn't also work in Emergency Medicine has demonstrated concern.
But I must say I'll never feel like harming myself for that reason; because I was the family member of a Trauma 1 patient before I ever did the work, translating as I know how utterly important it is for other families experiencing terrible things to need someone who actually understands some of their situation to be there for them. My personal experience is the reason I decided I had to go into the job and even MORE the reason it's impossible to "compartmentalize" things; if I did that I would feel like I'm doing them a disservice and have to quit for feeling inadequate to both care and be at enough of a distance to also help. It's just that usually I don't talk about it ... which is all I have to do to make it go away. Stop talking about it, everyone will think I got over it and things will go back to the way they were before I talked too much.
It's also just that ever since the NRA put out a commercial that explicitly blamed people who are trying to be sensible about who can have something that can kill you from across a room - and in war weapons case - across a damn football field - are accused by that ad in exact words that say "Gun control advocates have the blood of 6-yr old children on their hands for trying to take away guns from law-abiding citizens."
Right beFORE I saw this positively lovely and so helpful ad, I treated a pregnant woman who was shot 6 times by two people who were aiming for each other and she got in their crossfire by accident.
She was DOA and her 8 months along baby was taken from the womb and expedited into surgery, where 2 hours later it was declared dead. Then the father/husband of the baby/wife came in later still and was told that he lost both his wife and child who were killed in the crossfire of gang violence, NOT law-abiding citizens but the ****in' NRA has the goddam gall to blame everyone else for it.
Then when I visited this site and decided to talk about a little of it - mostly because after reading 'Guns' and knowing how Stephen King himSELF is against most of what I just described, I thought other people might find the information disturbing; but lo and behold all I really learned is that there are people who will delete you forever because you mentioned that Stephen King was for everything that President Obama suggested right after Newtown concerning the gun violence epidemic, and he was for it in an even more intense way than I myself am. He said in his essay 'Guns' that EIGHT rounds were enough but that he was "happy with 10." I don't agree with limiting magazines because for the 8 families who lose a loved one it isn't going to matter a damn that other people got to live; it won't matter in an emotional way anyway. They'll still be torn apart.
But it slightly surprises me that so many people who claim to like Stephen also seem to know nothing at all of his view in the 'Guns' essay.
I guess nobody else has read the essay, IDK, but I do know that seeing it all the time (gunshot wounds) makes me way more serious & sober about its effects than most people, which I have no idea if that's a positive or negative thing. I'm too exhausted to know. I've worked 2 shifts almost every day this week and this morning I found out the employer ****ed up my paycheck so that now I'm in dire straits financially and I won't be able to return here until a decision has been reached as to how I'm going to come up with money to buy food and pay rent. I absolutely refuse to start talking about the snafu in my paycheck bc I know there's nothing anyone can do about it. I know that about a lot of things, but I find it difficult sometimes to keep it all under my hat.
I actually thought of leaving my work when that thing happened with the pregnant woman and her baby and then the ad coming like a slap in the face 2 days later, but my partner talked me out of it.
Because gun violence has increased exponentially since that ad appeared, I think I'm going to reconsider leaving again because the sheer amount of bloodshed is freakin RIDICULOUS. I have no idea what the hell's suddenly going on with so many people shooting people...well anyway, I won't be back until the money matter is fixed. I can't be stressed about multiple things especially when every issue appears to matter to me. Finances, too many critical incidents and working so much I'm literally exhausted.
Incidentally, even that critical incident didn't make me want to harm myself but it did make me cry like a baby; with the absolute raw emotions of someone who felt completely sad for that family. And part of me already felt like a tiny portion of me was to blame anyway, which is obviously what brought on the Niagara Falls of tears in the first place
I'm going to be trying to read Mr. Mercedes while I'm on this hiatus, but since it's starting out really emotional for me, I have no idea how far I'll get.
I suspect what I'm REALLY going to do is re-read 'Guns' just to see if I fabricated his anger over what had happened.
He called Wayne LaPierre a "gun pimp" though. That doesn't strike me as a person who thinks the man (LaPierre) is playing with a full set of bocce balls.
He also said that "to say America is steeped in a culture of violence is bullshit" right after he said that "Mr. LaPierre always comes up with that explanation and he (Stephen King) doesn't believe the rationalization.
His exact words: "Let me be frank: to say that America is steeped in a culture of violence is bullshit. What America is steeped in is a culture of Kardashian." That's from his essay 'Guns.'
I'll leave for now with just one thought: I wonder what he would have to say of that commercial. After reading that essay, I honestly want to hear what he thinks about that ad.
He made me feel better because he still owns 3 guns "with a clear conscience" but he thinks Wayne LaPierre is peddling some bullshit.
I've never thought taking away all guns is rational. But for the record, nobody has ever said they want to do that.
I hope all that sounded right. Internet kills tones so effectively that I have no idea how writers can get tone in their e-books. I meant it in a spirit of goodness, but maybe my physical exhaustion made some other feeling come out. IDK. I keep being deleted by people who misunderstood my tone because it usually doesn't exist in online communication.
I do have good news though. I found a website called Pottermore, which is totally fun and almost stress-free (if I ignore the dozens of kids who want me to have a midnight duel with them) I'm also going to be over there. I know it's more for kids but having just plain fun is what I need.
I'll be back. Thank you for your concern.
This video explains why I became a Paramedic, and it has the added benefit of being positive because it's one of my gratitudes. One of my enormous gratitudes.
It's also just that ever since the NRA put out a commercial that explicitly blamed people who are trying to be sensible about who can have something that can kill you from across a room - and in war weapons case - across a damn football field - are accused by that ad in exact words that say "Gun control advocates have the blood of 6-yr old children on their hands for trying to take away guns from law-abiding citizens."
Right beFORE I saw this positively lovely and so helpful ad, I treated a pregnant woman who was shot 6 times by two people who were aiming for each other and she got in their crossfire by accident.
She was DOA and her 8 months along baby was taken from the womb and expedited into surgery, where 2 hours later it was declared dead. Then the father/husband of the baby/wife came in later still and was told that he lost both his wife and child who were killed in the crossfire of gang violence, NOT law-abiding citizens but the ****in' NRA has the goddam gall to blame everyone else for it.
Then when I visited this site and decided to talk about a little of it - mostly because after reading 'Guns' and knowing how Stephen King himSELF is against most of what I just described, I thought other people might find the information disturbing; but lo and behold all I really learned is that there are people who will delete you forever because you mentioned that Stephen King was for everything that President Obama suggested right after Newtown concerning the gun violence epidemic, and he was for it in an even more intense way than I myself am. He said in his essay 'Guns' that EIGHT rounds were enough but that he was "happy with 10." I don't agree with limiting magazines because for the 8 families who lose a loved one it isn't going to matter a damn that other people got to live; it won't matter in an emotional way anyway. They'll still be torn apart.
But it slightly surprises me that so many people who claim to like Stephen also seem to know nothing at all of his view in the 'Guns' essay.
I guess nobody else has read the essay, IDK, but I do know that seeing it all the time (gunshot wounds) makes me way more serious & sober about its effects than most people, which I have no idea if that's a positive or negative thing. I'm too exhausted to know. I've worked 2 shifts almost every day this week and this morning I found out the employer ****ed up my paycheck so that now I'm in dire straits financially and I won't be able to return here until a decision has been reached as to how I'm going to come up with money to buy food and pay rent. I absolutely refuse to start talking about the snafu in my paycheck bc I know there's nothing anyone can do about it. I know that about a lot of things, but I find it difficult sometimes to keep it all under my hat.
I actually thought of leaving my work when that thing happened with the pregnant woman and her baby and then the ad coming like a slap in the face 2 days later, but my partner talked me out of it.
Because gun violence has increased exponentially since that ad appeared, I think I'm going to reconsider leaving again because the sheer amount of bloodshed is freakin RIDICULOUS. I have no idea what the hell's suddenly going on with so many people shooting people...well anyway, I won't be back until the money matter is fixed. I can't be stressed about multiple things especially when every issue appears to matter to me. Finances, too many critical incidents and working so much I'm literally exhausted.
Incidentally, even that critical incident didn't make me want to harm myself but it did make me cry like a baby; with the absolute raw emotions of someone who felt completely sad for that family. And part of me already felt like a tiny portion of me was to blame anyway, which is obviously what brought on the Niagara Falls of tears in the first place
I'm going to be trying to read Mr. Mercedes while I'm on this hiatus, but since it's starting out really emotional for me, I have no idea how far I'll get.
I suspect what I'm REALLY going to do is re-read 'Guns' just to see if I fabricated his anger over what had happened.
He called Wayne LaPierre a "gun pimp" though. That doesn't strike me as a person who thinks the man (LaPierre) is playing with a full set of bocce balls.
He also said that "to say America is steeped in a culture of violence is bullshit" right after he said that "Mr. LaPierre always comes up with that explanation and he (Stephen King) doesn't believe the rationalization.
His exact words: "Let me be frank: to say that America is steeped in a culture of violence is bullshit. What America is steeped in is a culture of Kardashian." That's from his essay 'Guns.'
I'll leave for now with just one thought: I wonder what he would have to say of that commercial. After reading that essay, I honestly want to hear what he thinks about that ad.
He made me feel better because he still owns 3 guns "with a clear conscience" but he thinks Wayne LaPierre is peddling some bullshit.
I've never thought taking away all guns is rational. But for the record, nobody has ever said they want to do that.
I hope all that sounded right. Internet kills tones so effectively that I have no idea how writers can get tone in their e-books. I meant it in a spirit of goodness, but maybe my physical exhaustion made some other feeling come out. IDK. I keep being deleted by people who misunderstood my tone because it usually doesn't exist in online communication.
I do have good news though. I found a website called Pottermore, which is totally fun and almost stress-free (if I ignore the dozens of kids who want me to have a midnight duel with them) I'm also going to be over there. I know it's more for kids but having just plain fun is what I need.
I'll be back. Thank you for your concern.
This video explains why I became a Paramedic, and it has the added benefit of being positive because it's one of my gratitudes. One of my enormous gratitudes.
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Just letting you know that the "spoiler" tags were added because of message length.
....sadly old friend, that's wrapped for the year...and my vacation is drawing to a close, so the chasm of nerves and anxiety is once again opening up in my gut as I prepare to head back to prison tomorrow night....
I feel ya! I'm eading back to work after my weekend. Can feel myself getting more tense as the morning moves along.....We'll make it through, right?!
Thank you for sharing.
...I pray so...hate having my last day or two ruined by that impending feeling of doom...
Scott, I wanted to ask, in your prison system, how do you medical professionals treat the inmates when you use needles and scissors and scalpels... I mean, those are weapons, are you ever afraid that they will grab something up in the exam room and hurt someone with it? You, doc, officers, other inmates? How do you guys accomplish your job? And in general, are the inmates respectful to you all, or do they flip you sh*t? You should start a ASK SCOTT Prison Questions thread.
...needles are usually only in our hands for routine injections, and normally there are two nurses present or at least another close by and a Corrections Officer at the doorway...the diabetics do their own injections, but when they hand back the syringe we inspect for missing needles or springs...that's why I favor retractable syringes, because once the plunger is fully depressed the needle automatically retracts...other "tools" as they are called are either chained to heavy or immobile objects and the ones that aren't are under the same supervision/scrutiny as the needles...we do a count of all such items a minimum of three times a day or once per shift...and of course, we live in fear but a good one-because it keeps us on our toes, if we know what's good for us...we operate like a trauma/triage are and normal medical office as much as we can...and most are respectful because they want something, but they can all be asshats, if they don't get their way...and sadly, assaults on staff is more commonplace than we wish...and the usual warm & fuzzies go out the window in that environment for the most part...
Thanks, you could write a book on this topic.
Safety shield for you and co workers, Scott. Be safe.
I do know from personal experience how hard it is when you can't save someome from themselves. You did what you could and as others have said, love given never goes astray. Don't let this make your good heart hard.
Have you ever encountered an inmate that you truly felt bad for? Someone that maybe really shouldn't be there? A younger person perhaps? Are senior citizen inmates targets of rape?
EMT, Scott, KingRice and others who are so wonderful....you are the bestest and I pray for you because you matter to me.
I am not feeling very well right now but that shall pass. I have family visiting from the Fort. So there is safety in numbers and also comfort. You are all a significant presence in my life and can be included in the concept of family. Thank you so very much.
I am not feeling very well right now but that shall pass. I have family visiting from the Fort. So there is safety in numbers and also comfort. You are all a significant presence in my life and can be included in the concept of family. Thank you so very much.
One of the situations my son had trouble dealing with was, his job was to keep someone alive, or even bring them back, knowing full-well, it meant they would die a slow and painful death rather than the quick one they would have had if his ambulance didn't get there so fast. He didn't usually talk about his work, other than the first time he saved a life, and the few times he felt guilty for saving a life.
As a paramedic, he was not to decide whether or not to save, he was to save.
Scott, I have to ask. When an inmate has severe allergies, where are the epi-pens kept? I assume they cannot carry one themselves, but travelling any distance to bring one is not going to end well. And since kids in schools use peanuts or eggs to threaten other students with, I've no doubt a hardened criminal would think nothing of using it. Note to self: never get arrested. EVER!
...I have felt empathy for some, i.e. sensed that they knew they had blown it, and we would never see them in the system again...case in point, a young man-fresh out of the military, in on a drug charge-had gotten hooked on painkillers after being wounded and once out of the service-still needed his fix. Government is good at putting the monkey on the back, not so good at caging it again. So I guess that answers your first three questions in one. Overall, I have no sympathy...especially for felons with multiple numbers-what I term, "career criminals"...and no, the older inmates are more targets of extortion from what I've seen...the rape issues exists here-but not to the levels portrayed on film and in books and such...young men are more targeted for rape-there's a whole criteria to watch for...and there are enough homosexuals and guys who will do ANYTHING for money, that forced sex isn't that predominant...