Living Single

[DiO'Bolic]

After almost 25 years of marriage the wife tells people she finally figured out the meaning of true love... It’s not wanting to kill someone 24 hours a day. She’s such a romantic.

 

[swiftdog2.0]

I try to be like that, friendly to anyone who is also friendly. Sometimes, it backfires. Take this weekend, for instance. This guy that my best friend has been off-and-on again with for the last thirteen years (...yeah) suddenly started messaging me on Facebook. I have never met him, and just knowing the silly mind games he plays and weird stuff that goes on in his life, I never wanted to know him in the least. At first, he was just really polite and friendly, and giving that we both like drawing and art, I thought he just wanted to chat about that. But then it started to become clear that he was interested in becoming more than friends. And that is with him knowing what I’m going through and that I’m no where near ready to date people again. That is also with him knowing full well that my friend is (for whatever reason) still in love with him. And like I wasn’t going to tell her immediately about what he was doing.

But then I felt guilty, because I know that caused her even more heartache. Ack! I thought this sort of drama only happened in high school.
I really have to learn how to be assertive and not let other people make me feel uncomfortable. I don’t owe anybody anything. I have to keep telling myself that.

Facebook is a digital high school hell for adults. That’s why I deleted my Facebook account years ago. All drama all the time. No thanks.

 

[E.L.D]

Facebook is a digital high school hell for adults. That’s why I deleted my Facebook account years ago. All drama all the time. No thanks.

Thats why i refuse to get one.

 

[opeth]

I only go to Facebook to talk to athletes and actors I like. I don't go there to get picked up. I haven't added any friends in years.

 

[Jojo87]

I was single for many years before I met my partner 2014 (we are still together) I was sure that I never find the man of my life and
had already gave up the hope. I had a good time while I was single and was ready to build up my life alone and no one by my side.
But then my life changed suddenly 2014, which I did not think would have happened.

This isn't true anymore, I am single again. We broke up in August. But we are still good friends with my ex and hang out together as friends.

 

[carrie's younger brother]

Facebook is a digital high school hell for adults. That’s why I deleted my Facebook account years ago. All drama all the time. No thanks.

I pretty much figured that out once it got popular and heard so many people complaining about it. The only social media I do is Instagram. Much more civilized.

 

[fljoe0]

After almost 25 years of marriage the wife tells people she finally figured out the meaning of true love... It’s not wanting to kill someone 24 hours a day. She’s such a romantic.

I can't remember the exact wording or whose joke this was on the Hollywood Squares but the question was something like, "Fred and Betty just celebrated their 70th wedding anniversary. What did Fred say the secret to their longevity is?"
Celebrity answer: Fred lost his hearing 30 years ago.

 

[Wayoftheredpanda]

'Extraordinary' is my middle name. And I come with an 8-bit Nintendo Entertainment System, a 16-bit Super Nintendo System (with lots of games for both), and Puppet Master figures.

If you're happy being single, then enjoy it. Don't let people get to you if they tell you you've missed out on something. Being good with your choices is all that matters.

Favorite Snes game? Mine is Earthbound.

 

[DiO'Bolic]

Favorite Snes game? Mine is Earthbound.

Testing my memory, eh? I’d say The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past and Pilotwings.

 

[Wayoftheredpanda]

A Link to the Past is a great Zelda game

Testing my memory, eh? I’d say The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past and Pilotwings.

 

[Alexandra M]

If divorced counts, then I have been single for 14 years. I have had a few offers but not the right one. He just was not available and that made me sad for a few years. I doubt he even knew.
[automerge]1532531808[/automerge]
If divorced counts, then I have been single for 14 years. I have had a few offers but not the right one. He just was not available and that made me sad for a few years. I doubt he even knew.

 

[ghost19]

I'll be very honest, I didn't like being single at all. I was with my ex-wife for 21 years and got married to her when I was 22 years old, so almost half my life we were together. I'm not proud of the fact I don't do well on my own, someone my age should probably be a lot better prepared for being by themselves. I mean, I had my son during all the craziness but even though I couldn't control what happened to my ex-wife and I couldn't help her, I still felt, broken maybe is the word when I actually had to go thru with the divorce? When you spend that much time with someone, and a majority of the years we were together were good years, I'll be the first to admit, I had forgotten what not having that other person there in all respects was like. We had a child together, bought a house together, our lives were intricately entwined and running right thru the middle of it all was a sense of owning something that was uniquely ours. My shortcomings were balanced out by her strengths and vice versa. When she was no longer there, even though the person I shared my life with no longer existed, I still felt like half of a whole. My very sense of self was all of a sudden re-defined after the actual divorce paperwork was signed. All thru the process, I kept thinking she's either going to get better, or this is some sort of 5 year long nightmare I have to wake up from. Using this reasoning, I was able to hold off this crushing sense of loneliness that kept trying to overwhelm me when I least expected it. I would go along and think I was on top of it then all of sudden, I'd think to myself, "I'm no longer married" and it would almost be like a soul crushing wave of dread and despair came over me. It affected everything, my work, my home life, everything. I maintained for my son, that's what you do in that situation, but there were several times when he was staying at a friend's house or hanging out with my mom and dad that I would almost just fall completely apart. Then, I hated myself for feeling like that because I'm a guy and guys are supposed to be able to handle anything. I had trained my brain to handle anything over the years, at least I thought I had. What I had never trained for, I realized later, is how to do things as a single person because I think I had really forgotten, happily forgotten, what it felt like to not have someone over the years. When it happened to me, I was not prepared to be single even though I had basically been so for several years. While married, I still had a purpose to serve as far as trying to help my wife at the time get thru her mental issues and get our family back on track. I'm a fixer by nature and having to finally throw in the towel meant losing everything I'd come to know and define myself by. I was a married man for two decades then, with the stroke of a pen, I was a single dad. How do you do that?

So, what have I learned with the second chance I've been given at loving someone? I've learned to tell her every morning to have a good day, and to get that good bye kiss before I leave no matter how late we're both running. I've learned to NEVER take her for granted, not one day, not one hug, not one kiss. I make it a point to randomly tell her I'm glad she's by my side, and I'm glad we re-met when we did. I can see that this sometimes catches her off guard when I tell her those kind of things but it always makes her light up a bit too so I keep doing it. I buy her flowers for no reason, and I keep doing it as much as a reminder to myself to appreciate having someone to buy flowers for and to see the smile it puts on her face. When I see her face light up, or I get a call thanking me for the flowers, it's as much an affirmation that she's still there, that she's real and what we have is real, as it is the fact she loves flowers.

While my friends in high school were all dating left and right, trading locker room stories and planning their next female conquests, an awkward kid listened and just wanted one girl he could treat right, love, spoil, and spend the rest of his life with. That was more important to me than anything, because I had no game at all with girls..lol After I married the first time, I was happy to forget myself as a single guy and I cherished the title of being someone's husband. That was important to me, I liked the responsibility of being a husband, I loved telling everyone I was married. I'm very lucky to be able to do that now again, and I never miss an opportunity to introduce Tamara as my wife, because I'm very proud of her. If I had to be single again, I guess I could, I would have to be because I have a son and I'll always maintain for him no matter what. To be honest though, I don't ever want to be single again. I didn't enjoy it, not one bit. I'd rather have someone to talk to, communicate with, and most importantly, joke around with. Someone with a good sense of humor is just about impossible to replace and hers is almost as weird as mine is.

My hat is off to people who can go thru life single. Anyone who can do that is much, much stronger than I am because I just don't like the way my brain works when I don't have someone to focus on. I'm excluding children in that sentence, I always stay focused on my son, but that other type of focus is different, completely.

Think I'll shut up now, sorry for the long winded post, but you're all used to that by now from me, right?......right? I hear my old Sergeant in the background screaming "NICE REPORT HILL! IT'D BE NICER IF I DIDN'T NEED A GD THREE RING BINDER TO FILE IT!"

 

[GNTLGNT]

I'll be very honest, I didn't like being single at all. I was with my ex-wife for 21 years and got married to her when I was 22 years old, so almost half my life we were together. I'm not proud of the fact I don't do well on my own, someone my age should probably be a lot better prepared for being by themselves. I mean, I had my son during all the craziness but even though I couldn't control what happened to my ex-wife and I couldn't help her, I still felt, broken maybe is the word when I actually had to go thru with the divorce? When you spend that much time with someone, and a majority of the years we were together were good years, I'll be the first to admit, I had forgotten what not having that other person there in all respects was like. We had a child together, bought a house together, our lives were intricately entwined and running right thru the middle of it all was a sense of owning something that was uniquely ours. My shortcomings were balanced out by her strengths and vice versa. When she was no longer there, even though the person I shared my life with no longer existed, I still felt like half of a whole. My very sense of self was all of a sudden re-defined after the actual divorce paperwork was signed. All thru the process, I kept thinking she's either going to get better, or this is some sort of 5 year long nightmare I have to wake up from. Using this reasoning, I was able to hold off this crushing sense of loneliness that kept trying to overwhelm me when I least expected it. I would go along and think I was on top of it then all of sudden, I'd think to myself, "I'm no longer married" and it would almost be like a soul crushing wave of dread and despair came over me. It affected everything, my work, my home life, everything. I maintained for my son, that's what you do in that situation, but there were several times when he was staying at a friend's house or hanging out with my mom and dad that I would almost just fall completely apart. Then, I hated myself for feeling like that because I'm a guy and guys are supposed to be able to handle anything. I had trained my brain to handle anything over the years, at least I thought I had. What I had never trained for, I realized later, is how to do things as a single person because I think I had really forgotten, happily forgotten, what it felt like to not have someone over the years. When it happened to me, I was not prepared to be single even though I had basically been so for several years. While married, I still had a purpose to serve as far as trying to help my wife at the time get thru her mental issues and get our family back on track. I'm a fixer by nature and having to finally throw in the towel meant losing everything I'd come to know and define myself by. I was a married man for two decades then, with the stroke of a pen, I was a single dad. How do you do that?

So, what have I learned with the second chance I've been given at loving someone? I've learned to tell her every morning to have a good day, and to get that good bye kiss before I leave no matter how late we're both running. I've learned to NEVER take her for granted, not one day, not one hug, not one kiss. I make it a point to randomly tell her I'm glad she's by my side, and I'm glad we re-met when we did. I can see that this sometimes catches her off guard when I tell her those kind of things but it always makes her light up a bit too so I keep doing it. I buy her flowers for no reason, and I keep doing it as much as a reminder to myself to appreciate having someone to buy flowers for and to see the smile it puts on her face. When I see her face light up, or I get a call thanking me for the flowers, it's as much an affirmation that she's still there, that she's real and what we have is real, as it is the fact she loves flowers.

While my friends in high school were all dating left and right, trading locker room stories and planning their next female conquests, an awkward kid listened and just wanted one girl he could treat right, love, spoil, and spend the rest of his life with. That was more important to me than anything, because I had no game at all with girls..lol After I married the first time, I was happy to forget myself as a single guy and I cherished the title of being someone's husband. That was important to me, I liked the responsibility of being a husband, I loved telling everyone I was married. I'm very lucky to be able to do that now again, and I never miss an opportunity to introduce Tamara as my wife, because I'm very proud of her. If I had to be single again, I guess I could, I would have to be because I have a son and I'll always maintain for him no matter what. To be honest though, I don't ever want to be single again. I didn't enjoy it, not one bit. I'd rather have someone to talk to, communicate with, and most importantly, joke around with. Someone with a good sense of humor is just about impossible to replace and hers is almost as weird as mine is.

My hat is off to people who can go thru life single. Anyone who can do that is much, much stronger than I am because I just don't like the way my brain works when I don't have someone to focus on. I'm excluding children in that sentence, I always stay focused on my son, but that other type of focus is different, completely.

Think I'll shut up now, sorry for the long winded post, but you're all used to that by now from me, right?......right? I hear my old Sergeant in the background screaming "NICE REPORT HILL! IT'D BE NICER IF I DIDN'T NEED A GD THREE RING BINDER TO FILE IT!"

...love it bro...you distill things simply and beautifully....

 

[Spideyman]

I'll be very honest, I didn't like being single at all. I was with my ex-wife for 21 years and got married to her when I was 22 years old, so almost half my life we were together. I'm not proud of the fact I don't do well on my own, someone my age should probably be a lot better prepared for being by themselves. I mean, I had my son during all the craziness but even though I couldn't control what happened to my ex-wife and I couldn't help her, I still felt, broken maybe is the word when I actually had to go thru with the divorce? When you spend that much time with someone, and a majority of the years we were together were good years, I'll be the first to admit, I had forgotten what not having that other person there in all respects was like. We had a child together, bought a house together, our lives were intricately entwined and running right thru the middle of it all was a sense of owning something that was uniquely ours. My shortcomings were balanced out by her strengths and vice versa. When she was no longer there, even though the person I shared my life with no longer existed, I still felt like half of a whole. My very sense of self was all of a sudden re-defined after the actual divorce paperwork was signed. All thru the process, I kept thinking she's either going to get better, or this is some sort of 5 year long nightmare I have to wake up from. Using this reasoning, I was able to hold off this crushing sense of loneliness that kept trying to overwhelm me when I least expected it. I would go along and think I was on top of it then all of sudden, I'd think to myself, "I'm no longer married" and it would almost be like a soul crushing wave of dread and despair came over me. It affected everything, my work, my home life, everything. I maintained for my son, that's what you do in that situation, but there were several times when he was staying at a friend's house or hanging out with my mom and dad that I would almost just fall completely apart. Then, I hated myself for feeling like that because I'm a guy and guys are supposed to be able to handle anything. I had trained my brain to handle anything over the years, at least I thought I had. What I had never trained for, I realized later, is how to do things as a single person because I think I had really forgotten, happily forgotten, what it felt like to not have someone over the years. When it happened to me, I was not prepared to be single even though I had basically been so for several years. While married, I still had a purpose to serve as far as trying to help my wife at the time get thru her mental issues and get our family back on track. I'm a fixer by nature and having to finally throw in the towel meant losing everything I'd come to know and define myself by. I was a married man for two decades then, with the stroke of a pen, I was a single dad. How do you do that?

So, what have I learned with the second chance I've been given at loving someone? I've learned to tell her every morning to have a good day, and to get that good bye kiss before I leave no matter how late we're both running. I've learned to NEVER take her for granted, not one day, not one hug, not one kiss. I make it a point to randomly tell her I'm glad she's by my side, and I'm glad we re-met when we did. I can see that this sometimes catches her off guard when I tell her those kind of things but it always makes her light up a bit too so I keep doing it. I buy her flowers for no reason, and I keep doing it as much as a reminder to myself to appreciate having someone to buy flowers for and to see the smile it puts on her face. When I see her face light up, or I get a call thanking me for the flowers, it's as much an affirmation that she's still there, that she's real and what we have is real, as it is the fact she loves flowers.

While my friends in high school were all dating left and right, trading locker room stories and planning their next female conquests, an awkward kid listened and just wanted one girl he could treat right, love, spoil, and spend the rest of his life with. That was more important to me than anything, because I had no game at all with girls..lol After I married the first time, I was happy to forget myself as a single guy and I cherished the title of being someone's husband. That was important to me, I liked the responsibility of being a husband, I loved telling everyone I was married. I'm very lucky to be able to do that now again, and I never miss an opportunity to introduce Tamara as my wife, because I'm very proud of her. If I had to be single again, I guess I could, I would have to be because I have a son and I'll always maintain for him no matter what. To be honest though, I don't ever want to be single again. I didn't enjoy it, not one bit. I'd rather have someone to talk to, communicate with, and most importantly, joke around with. Someone with a good sense of humor is just about impossible to replace and hers is almost as weird as mine is.

My hat is off to people who can go thru life single. Anyone who can do that is much, much stronger than I am because I just don't like the way my brain works when I don't have someone to focus on. I'm excluding children in that sentence, I always stay focused on my son, but that other type of focus is different, completely.

Think I'll shut up now, sorry for the long winded post, but you're all used to that by now from me, right?......right? I hear my old Sergeant in the background screaming "NICE REPORT HILL! IT'D BE NICER IF I DIDN'T NEED A GD THREE RING BINDER TO FILE IT!"

From your heart and well spoken. Your family is blessed to have you, and you to have them!

 

[Dana Jean]

I'll be very honest, I didn't like being single at all. I was with my ex-wife for 21 years and got married to her when I was 22 years old, so almost half my life we were together. I'm not proud of the fact I don't do well on my own, someone my age should probably be a lot better prepared for being by themselves. I mean, I had my son during all the craziness but even though I couldn't control what happened to my ex-wife and I couldn't help her, I still felt, broken maybe is the word when I actually had to go thru with the divorce? When you spend that much time with someone, and a majority of the years we were together were good years, I'll be the first to admit, I had forgotten what not having that other person there in all respects was like. We had a child together, bought a house together, our lives were intricately entwined and running right thru the middle of it all was a sense of owning something that was uniquely ours. My shortcomings were balanced out by her strengths and vice versa. When she was no longer there, even though the person I shared my life with no longer existed, I still felt like half of a whole. My very sense of self was all of a sudden re-defined after the actual divorce paperwork was signed. All thru the process, I kept thinking she's either going to get better, or this is some sort of 5 year long nightmare I have to wake up from. Using this reasoning, I was able to hold off this crushing sense of loneliness that kept trying to overwhelm me when I least expected it. I would go along and think I was on top of it then all of sudden, I'd think to myself, "I'm no longer married" and it would almost be like a soul crushing wave of dread and despair came over me. It affected everything, my work, my home life, everything. I maintained for my son, that's what you do in that situation, but there were several times when he was staying at a friend's house or hanging out with my mom and dad that I would almost just fall completely apart. Then, I hated myself for feeling like that because I'm a guy and guys are supposed to be able to handle anything. I had trained my brain to handle anything over the years, at least I thought I had. What I had never trained for, I realized later, is how to do things as a single person because I think I had really forgotten, happily forgotten, what it felt like to not have someone over the years. When it happened to me, I was not prepared to be single even though I had basically been so for several years. While married, I still had a purpose to serve as far as trying to help my wife at the time get thru her mental issues and get our family back on track. I'm a fixer by nature and having to finally throw in the towel meant losing everything I'd come to know and define myself by. I was a married man for two decades then, with the stroke of a pen, I was a single dad. How do you do that?

So, what have I learned with the second chance I've been given at loving someone? I've learned to tell her every morning to have a good day, and to get that good bye kiss before I leave no matter how late we're both running. I've learned to NEVER take her for granted, not one day, not one hug, not one kiss. I make it a point to randomly tell her I'm glad she's by my side, and I'm glad we re-met when we did. I can see that this sometimes catches her off guard when I tell her those kind of things but it always makes her light up a bit too so I keep doing it. I buy her flowers for no reason, and I keep doing it as much as a reminder to myself to appreciate having someone to buy flowers for and to see the smile it puts on her face. When I see her face light up, or I get a call thanking me for the flowers, it's as much an affirmation that she's still there, that she's real and what we have is real, as it is the fact she loves flowers.

While my friends in high school were all dating left and right, trading locker room stories and planning their next female conquests, an awkward kid listened and just wanted one girl he could treat right, love, spoil, and spend the rest of his life with. That was more important to me than anything, because I had no game at all with girls..lol After I married the first time, I was happy to forget myself as a single guy and I cherished the title of being someone's husband. That was important to me, I liked the responsibility of being a husband, I loved telling everyone I was married. I'm very lucky to be able to do that now again, and I never miss an opportunity to introduce Tamara as my wife, because I'm very proud of her. If I had to be single again, I guess I could, I would have to be because I have a son and I'll always maintain for him no matter what. To be honest though, I don't ever want to be single again. I didn't enjoy it, not one bit. I'd rather have someone to talk to, communicate with, and most importantly, joke around with. Someone with a good sense of humor is just about impossible to replace and hers is almost as weird as mine is.

My hat is off to people who can go thru life single. Anyone who can do that is much, much stronger than I am because I just don't like the way my brain works when I don't have someone to focus on. I'm excluding children in that sentence, I always stay focused on my son, but that other type of focus is different, completely.

Think I'll shut up now, sorry for the long winded post, but you're all used to that by now from me, right?......right? I hear my old Sergeant in the background screaming "NICE REPORT HILL! IT'D BE NICER IF I DIDN'T NEED A GD THREE RING BINDER TO FILE IT!"

It is so refreshing to see a man want nothing more than a good life partner. I couldn't be more tickled for your little family.

 

[Neesy]

Am I the ONLY single person on this site??

And I'm not complaining about it. This pretty much sums it up ^^^
Marriage and especially kids were never a priority for me and I've stayed single by choice. Dated, had my share of fun when I was younger and now I just feel...settled. In a good way.

Decided to reply to this thread after all. We’ve been married for 13 years but Andy has been up North in Baker Lake Nunavut for six years now, since August 2012.

We see him at Christmas time and in the summer. Each time he is home for about five weeks then it’s back to the Nunamiut Lodge.

So I do feel sorta single even though I’m technically married.

He will be 65 years old next June so maybe he will retire. Who knows? He is pretty close mouthed about most things.

After meeting you in person last week Lori I must say that anyone who spends time with you is better because of it. You have a great personality and are lots of fun!

I remember when we were down in the Barrens and there was one of those sewer things full of weeds...

You said “Get in the hole Neesy!” You’re hilarious - I would have done so but it was too far down to climb

 

[ghost19]

It is so refreshing to see a man want nothing more than a good life partner. I couldn't be more tickled for your little family.

Thanks DJ. Much appreciated.

 

[misery chastain loves co.]

Decided to reply to this thread after all. We’ve been married for 13 years but Andy has been up North in Baker Lake Nunavut for six years now, since August 2012.

We see him at Christmas time and in the summer. Each time he is home for about five weeks then it’s back to the Nunamiut Lodge.

So I do feel sorta single even though I’m technically married.

He will be 65 years old next June so maybe he will retire. Who knows? He is pretty close mouthed about most things.

After meeting you in person last week Lori I must say that anyone who spends time with you is better because of it. You have a great personality and are lots of fun!

I remember when we were down in the Barrens and there was one of those sewer things full of weeds...

You said “Get in the hole Neesy!” You’re hilarious - I would have done so but it was too far down to climb

wow Neesy, thank you so much. You're making me tear up darling! I am so happy to have met you and Josh! Maybe when Andy does retire you can take a trip back here and bring him. I promise you won't have to get in my car

 

[Cowboy]

I'm single again and have been for 3-4 years now. I'm loving it and will never be ma