Cori, the decorations are just an outward sign of holiday spirit. They're not as important as how you feel. But they do help get one into that spirit. Spidey has a good suggestion; church groups usually can help. Or call the city or county social services. They might know of a volunteer group.
I do understand not wanting to Christmas, though. (sorry ghost, it's become a verb) For the past few years, I just don't care about putting up a tree or decorating. Since Mom dies and my daughter is grown, it just seems... I dunno.... meh. I still get gifts for everyone -- I have a rep to uphold as the best gift-giver in the family -- and wrap them nicely (also a rep there) but the accouterments just fall flat for me.
It could have been a sign I was doing things all wrong. For one, elaborate crafts, well I enjoyed doing them and said I wanted to, but working on them was a way to keep my mind off *things*, and they were an attempt to sorta grab some good karma out of the atmosphere in case I was building up a lot of bad juju or something. Like if they turned out really neat I'd be pleased enough to pretend what I had done was important and I had a right to feel all right which I was raised not to believe.
Yes, a church group was my dream! They did wonderful things like build a ramp when my dad became disabled (the replacement of which I now use) and certainly when the previous pastor was terminally ill people provided food and other services. So far have really not heard from anyone, possibly a few of the people who posted on Facebook have attended church with me. (Now I am going all sheep and goats!) Going up and down the hospital halls, I thought how many times was my dad as a pastor here to visit patients (never mind how often he was one)! Incidentally, I have lived here for 46 years and have NEVER been a hospital patient either in Dayton or Walla Walla! Nor Kennewick either for that matter; the time I was burned I was treated in the ER and then released. Nor have I ever missed a Christmas Eve Service in Dayton. So I hope my procedure on the 17th allows me to leave the house!
Gifts, I used to stress over terribly. There was a beautiful store in town specializing in unique things, I loved the owners and tried to buy gifts there, but when they went out of business I basically said screw this. I buy Amazon gift cards for everybody. This year, though, I ACTUALLY thought of presents my sisters would like, I thought I'll order THEM at least anyway, but nothing now till I get home. Cards, I did before the internet, but I have maybe two friends now living who send cards. I do have a card for the daughter of a lady who passed away over the summer who used to send cards. Wrapping, I realized I hated and one year from a catalog I bought decorated gift boxes, and hoard every decorated box and bag which comes in. Having boxes available in different sizes used to be a huge issue and now I literally can't even give the things away. (Well, I have tried and two people said they may take some.)
Other big issue, okay I throw a gift card at my living relatives or if feeling really generous give used books. But I go all out for my dead friends. Easily half the hand-crafted decorations were intended for the cemetery. I ALWAYS have them up for the holidays REGARDLESS of weather, this will be the first I have not in many years. One guy who knows me strictly because we both frequent the cemetery has come over twice (but not just to be nice to me; his wife is in the next room) and said I was darn lucky this didn't happen in the summer as I would have gone nuts wanting to be there every day. (Truth.) I made a custom Celtic cross for one dead friend and one of these nights in the hospital I dreamed I made my sister take me to the cemetery (this is the sister always accusing me of morbidity and excessive fascination with death and she didn't want to go) and when we got there I found the cross smashed to atoms and kept saying, "I can't believe it, I spent a zillion hours on this."